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My Son’s Penis Problem

This is very, very long, but it is also very, very worth it. Enjoy.
 
penis problem, son's, son, mom, curved penis, massage

son't penis, mother, problem, massage, curved

78 Responses to "My Son’s Penis Problem"

  1. Download Xbox Games says:

    this is a real WTF!!! the end is coming

  2. Ev says:

    Yeah, and the fact that his mom is roughing up the suspect for him 3 times a week isn’t gonna have any effect on his dating life. Jesus Christ! Why doesn’t she just try to straighten it with her Vaginal canal?

  3. Anonymous says:

    Please stop doing this lady!! This is wrong. I had a boyfriend in high school with a similar issue and it was not a problem. His bent penis was very pleasurable when we were together. This guy doesn’t have a girlfriend because his mother is molesting him!! That’s the only problem here. Mom- get yourself a boyfriend and leave your son alone. His dick is fine!! Hey dude- please move out, get some therapy and there will be a lovely women waiting for you in your future as long as your mother stops jacking you off!! Jesus Christ!!!!!

  4. Bill says:

    Dammit, all MY mom ever did was keep me stocked up on tube socks.

  5. Anonymous says:

    that would be incest you sick f*ck

  6. Anonymous says:

    I like how you brought age into the fold to show how wrong this is…

  7. Anonymous says:

    Nah she’s as American as apple pie and Oedipus complexes

  8. Anonymous says:

    I’m actually a little relieved. Up until the last post I thought it was his dad writing the thread.

  9. Anonymous says:

    Because his name was “Female Guest”? Makes sense.

    Fucktard.

  10. Anonymous says:

    The way she types makes me think she’s a foreigner…

  11. Kyle W says:

    This is almost always wrong…Unless your Mom is extremely hott. JK. But seriously

  12. Anonymous says:

    You know, I find this really disturbing. Maybe this woman should own up to the fact that she’s been single way too long and start dating people her own age that she’s not related to, and stop jacking off her son. She can call it what she wants, but she is in fact jacking off her son to the point of orgasm for 2 hours 3 days a week. And besides, the upward bend is amazing for g-spot stimulation.

  13. Anonymous says:

    I think I need to see a therapist after reading this………… A Massage Therapist.

  14. Anonymous says:

    old copypasta is old

  15. VideoVampire says:

    I am just picturing an old fat lady making her son hold still fro his daily “session”, and the kid like saying (read: eric cartmans voice)”But Maaaawwwwmmmmmm!” lol, freakin hilarious.

  16. aaron says:

    wow. what kid would allow their parent to do this to them?

  17. Sam Bence says:

    Seriously, I used to have a similar problem. Yet my penis was inverted to the point when erect it resembled a small button mushroom.
    My mum administered (Sue Blacker) a similar procedure, but instead massaging my penis. She would lick the tip of “the shroom” (it’s a name thats kinda stuck) since I was 7 years old. The problem has lessened slightly yet I am unable to give any females pleasure.
    If anyone can help me, please let me know.
    The best way on contacting me is probably via facebook:
    http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=542267686&ref=ts

    cheers :D :D

    Sam x

  18. Pierre says:

    Best fucking troll EVER.

  19. Pierre says:

    I’d like to add that the best part about getting older is that the amount of MILFs increases exponentially with your age (until about your mid-40s)

  20. DFC3 says:

    Can I be her adopted son? I’ll bend mine into a horseshoe to get a treatment from her like that!! haha

  21. Bizz says:

    dear god this is so wrong.

    10 bucks its a 4chan person creating a new mem

  22. Michael says:

    How could you not get close to anyone that jerked you off for two hours three times a week even if it was your mom or not. I would be happy for someone to just do it once in a while, give my hand a rest.

  23. Anonymous says:

    it already is incest

  24. Tyler says:

    The internet….just when I thought I had seen it all.

  25. dadsgravy says:

    Actually, this is a serious problem. I used to have the same thing, but it was in the middle of the shaft, so it actually looked like a horseshoe. My mom was no message therapist, but she applied the same technique. The only difference was that she only hand one hand. And that hook would really pinch.

  26. CMoney says:

    The whole thing has left me feeling uncomfortably aroused.

  27. Anonymous says:

    if he was 23 would it be better? haha

  28. mac says:

    anyone who is complaining that their mom didn’t give them this type of treatment should be kicked in the mouth and stabbed with a spork

  29. Anonymous says:

    Molester Mom and Son J should hook up with Hulk and Brooke Hogan. If you can’t keep it in your pants, keep it in the family!

  30. Anonymous says:

    Best thread Ever. Best Mom Ever!

  31. todders says:

    double-plus foul…

    that’s what leads to this kida shit:

    http://www.digitalfuntown.com/videos/160

  32. Pierre says:

    At least you can fuck your own bellybutton. Grease that sucker up and go to town on your pillow.

  33. Socks & Sandals says:

    apparently the end is coming 3 times per session

  34. Steve says:

    ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… yeah. where i come from it’s called incest. the kid’s 19. What the fuck.

  35. Gersch says:

    Meet my friend, Mr Freud.

  36. JoJo says:

    Best ending ever lol

  37. Anonymous says:

    haha so did i

  38. jill says:

    omfg this acutualy worked holy Sh*t Thanks Penisfixer

  39. Richard Tucker says:

    *jacks*

  40. Richard Tucker says:

    In *this* economy?

  41. MSUDonkey says:

    With the price of gas!!!

  42. Anonymous says:

    Buy him a hooker to have sex with

  43. Anonymous says:

    “that made me hard”- is the quote of the year

  44. henryg says:

    is this some type of early april fool’s joke? whats next i gave my son a circumsion and kept his tip wet by putting it in my mouth

  45. Anonymous says:

    too true

  46. Jason says:

    What if it hooks to the side?

  47. Loves the Hook says:

    Ignoring how fantastically wrong it is for a mother (no matter her training) to massage her grown son’s penis…

    Ignoring how unlikely it is that this post is real…

    PLEASE STOP TRYING TO FIX THAT HOOK!! For the love of all that is hot and orgasmic! The best c*ck I ever f*cked belonged to a guy who had a perfect upward curve. It tickled my G-spot every time, in every position! It was PERFECT!! True, the guy sucked, his foreplay sucked, the aftermath sucked… but the sex was unf*cking believeable!!!

    ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY HOOK – THE MOST PERFECT OF ALL PENISES!

  48. Anonymous says:

    Here’s the actual link so you sickos can comment on the real site:

    http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/board/my-son-s-penis-problem-t55701.html

  49. The Bishop says:

    The last comment by “Guest” cracked me up. Sort of put it into perspective.

  50. Anonymous says:

    4chan.

    Internet heroes.

  51. Anonymous says:

    Here’s a tip:

    She could go “professionally massage tissue” other kids non-related to her, and then with that money, pay another person to “massage” her son.

    Or maybe she wants to.

  52. Anonymous says:

    l

  53. Anonymous says:

    Omg it’s a real website holy crap! I’m not even sure what to say to this!!!

  54. Anonymous says:

    i think that someone made this up….sick but very creative

  55. Anonymous says:

    LMAO seriously… what the f*ck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just wow!

  56. Anonymous says:

    seriously WTF?

  57. Akadaka says:

    HAHAHHAHAH,
    the thread is seriosly sick (as in disgusting) and my penis curves to the left a bit and i can give good pleasre. My girlfriend loves it and all i can say to this 19 year old boy is try and accept youself the way you are, or if your desperate, go get some surgery. STOP LETTING YOUR MUM PLAY WITH YOUR POPPYCOCK!!!

    but seriously, all the comments are hilarious….

  58. Niqabi says:

    has anyone thought that maybe, just maybe, shes jacking off her retarded child?

  59. Anonymous says:

    I don’t see why everyone finds this so funny, I’ve heard this is a hereditary condition, and I can’t thank my mom enough for helping me get over this. My sons all have had this problem, but fortunately I was able to remember the technique and straighten them out

  60. hotdude274 says:

    umm….. i think it would b better if this friend of urs or his own father did it instead of you. with his own mother getting him to an orgasm in any way is just promoting incest. let a man do it.

  61. acid_burn_you says:

    damn that was funny and creepy!!! what a twisted mom!!
    i hop police find you so fast to throw you in jail .
    ohh yea dude get a life and till you mom to stop missing with you dick damn now you need to get help too

  62. Bonkers says:

    wish my mum did that to me

  63. Chad says:

    This is what’s wrong with Society nowadays.
    If he can’t get a gf, why not just fuck his mom?
    She’s jacking his dick off anyway, she ain’t married.
    So why not? This shit is fucked up.
    Kinda nauseated now.
    Not at the issue shes molesting her son.
    But that he has a fucked up penis.
    Poor kid.

  64. that was fcked up says:

    holy shyt. QUICK someone call Dr. Phil! or better yet Steve Wilkos… actually we might need Jerry for this one!!!

  65. George says:

    Finger lickin’ good mommy!

  66. Bob says:

    well just lowered my thoughts of man again can’t get much lower, I hope.

  67. Anonymous says:

    That was the funniest thing I’ve read in quite some time… I’m crying right now…

  68. Anonymous says:

    I’m Joe from Albany and I approve of this type of therapy.

  69. Anonymous says:

    Someone needs to get that lady a boyfriend.

  70. Anonymous says:

    That is fuckin gross.She’s basically trying to legitimize incest by saying it’s a “massage”.Take him to a Dr. Weird woman.

  71. Taliek Brown says:

    If this is true, it is without a doubt the most f’ed up thing I have ever heard. Couldn’t a professional CMT do the same thing, perhaps even more quickly, without having to resort to JERKING OFF YOUR OWN SON?

  72. TG says:

    Not Jerking off she was giving the penis a “professional tissue massage” which just happened to cause him to ejaculate.

  73. Anonymous says:

    that was not worth reading…f***ing freaks

  74. Jennifer Leigh says:

    I saw this on reddit…**shudder**

  75. Anonymous says:

    I was completely disturbed after reading this, but everyones comments made me laugh so hard! You people are halarious!

  76. Dom says:

    I’m. Fucking. Speechless.

  77. jet61 says:

    here is the thing
    you can do more for your son.
    you can start using your vagina to get a more straight line and bit by bit to get the perfect line you move to the anal position
    the thing is one day he gets maried and then ,if he has a daughter and not having fun with his wife,do you think it will be ok for his daughter to take over what you where doing
    i know you are trying to get justification or may be an excuse to continue
    just make up your mind you know what is the rite thing to do
    one more thing..can i get a massage mine is a bit cuved and my wife loves it ,i just want her off my back

  78. Anonymous says:

    my penis curves upward like a J. I think I need massage therapy 2 hours a day, three days a week. I should forward this to my wife….