Where you’ve seen her:Natasha Polevshchikova is a Victoria’s Secret model, so you’ve seen her in a bunch of lame ads where she’s lying on a rock and some douche with a popped collar and high cheek bones is really close to her face. But she’s usually wearing very little, so you don’t mind all that much.
Pointless quote: “After modeling, I’m going to study or open a shop in my city.
Me: It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it is told.
Natasha Polevshchikova: Mister… my family will pay. Whatever ransom you’re askin’ for, they pay it.
Me: It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.
[to his dog, Rambo]
Me: Yes, it will Rambo, won’t it? It will get the hose!
Natasha Polevshchikova: Okay… okay… okay. Mister, if you let me go, I won’t – I won’t press charges I promise. See, my mom is a one-legged, Russian prostitute, she can mail you a signed photo of Michael Gorbachev, and half-a-case of vodka.
Me: Now it places the lotion in the basket.
Natasha Polevshchikova: Please! Please I wanna go home! I wanna go home please!
Me: It places the lotion in the basket.
Natasha Polevshchikova: I wanna see my mommy! Please I wanna see my…
I know her. She’s nice. But that’s about it. They sure breed em SLOW-WITTED. I mean, she literally couldn’t open a door with a set of keys — granted it wasn’t her apartment — but she’s not used to dealing with stuff herself, it’s an amazing trait. In essence wealthy men or her agency handles all day to day stuff. Pretty brilliant.
Me: It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it is told.
Natasha Polevshchikova: Mister… my family will pay. Whatever ransom you’re askin’ for, they pay it.
Me: It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.
[to his dog, Rambo]
Me: Yes, it will Rambo, won’t it? It will get the hose!
Natasha Polevshchikova: Okay… okay… okay. Mister, if you let me go, I won’t – I won’t press charges I promise. See, my mom is a one-legged, Russian prostitute, she can mail you a signed photo of Michael Gorbachev, and half-a-case of vodka.
Me: Now it places the lotion in the basket.
Natasha Polevshchikova: Please! Please I wanna go home! I wanna go home please!
Me: It places the lotion in the basket.
Natasha Polevshchikova: I wanna see my mommy! Please I wanna see my…
Me: Put the fucking lotion in the basket!
put the dog in the basket, not the lotion you cheezeball.
Also, she looks like Skeletor.
great post Buddy.
Why is there a picture of her eating a melting ice cream cone?
SillyPutty, I’m right, you’re wrong. The dog scene was after this, you turd-burger.
I know her. She’s nice. But that’s about it. They sure breed em SLOW-WITTED. I mean, she literally couldn’t open a door with a set of keys — granted it wasn’t her apartment — but she’s not used to dealing with stuff herself, it’s an amazing trait. In essence wealthy men or her agency handles all day to day stuff. Pretty brilliant.