Patrick Swayze was a complete badass. He had an insane ability to appeal to women as a sex symbol, and to men as a totally awesome dude. In other words, he could seduce your girlfriend and kick your ass. Sure, he was in Dirty Dancing and Ghost. Those were movies for chicks, though. Patrick was also a key element of some of the most kick-ass action movies of our generation:
Red Dawn
aka, The Most Badass Movie About Cold War Era Kids Blowing the Shit Out of Russians Ever. I used to re-create this movie with G.I. Joes, that's how much I liked it. The film boasts an incredible cast of future-superstars (Charlie Sheen, Leah Thompson, Jennifer Grey, etc.), and Swayze is the anchor of this incredible ensemble. Also, they drink deer's blood and blow a bunch of shit up. Awesome.
Point Break
aka The Most Badass Movie About An Undercover Cop Infiltrating a Clan of Surfing, Skydiving, Thrill-Seeking Bank Robbers Ever. Swayze was already a household name by the time Point Break came out, but the film provided an opportunity for him to say to the world "Hey, World, just wanted to let you know that I'm still an awesome motherf*cker." Mission accomplished, Swayze. Mission accomplished.
Road House
aka Proof Positive That Swayze Is One of the Most Badass Dudes in the Entire World. Road House is a movie about Patrick Swayze kicking the shit out of people. That's pretty much all it is. He rolls into town and he beats the living hell out of a bunch of bad guys, encountering titties along the way. Sure, there's one famous scene where a well-oiled, bemulleted Swayze does some Tai Chi by a lake for a little too long. This is to give your girlfriend a reason to sit through two hours of people getting their faces knocked off. A little something for the ladies, get it? Because that's how Swayze rolled.
I kept making fun of my girlfriend, saying that Swayze will come back as a ghost and make a clay pot with her. She didn't know whether to get mad at me or laugh.
How could you not mention Steel Mutherfucken Dawn man! STEEL DAWN.
Like if The Samurai and Mad Max had a baby it would in Steel Dawn and Swayze was in it and he kicked ass, stabbing people with trick swords and knives and stuff.
Probably because you're the only fucking person that ever saw that movie. In fact, I had to Google it just to see if it was a real movie.... Looks awesome. Not.
What about Youngblood...? Although Rob Lowe did everything in his power to make it the most homoerotic sports movie ever, it's still a great hockey movie filled with fights, booze and Ms McGill. Ohhhhhh Ms McGill.
Derrek Sutton: "Here's to the game and getting out of this hick town! Thank God there is a sport for middle-sized white boys."
bottom line, Swayze mad some pretty badass films. and he himself is a total an complete badass and for that i say thank you Patrick Swayze for entertaining me for years and years to come. except 4 ghost and dirty dancing
hey fags just so you know the reason the USSR never invade the US was because they were afraid that with every household having an arsenal of private weapons, local militias would beat their tiny red army to pieces.
That and their whole piece of shit country would get nuked in ten minutes.
(11 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
September 15th, 2009 at 05:33 pm
It looks like Billy Mays and Farrah Fawcett get their Christmas wish early this year.
September 15th, 2009 at 09:02 pm
Women be shoppin.
September 15th, 2009 at 09:54 pm
I kept making fun of my girlfriend, saying that Swayze will come back as a ghost and make a clay pot with her. She didn't know whether to get mad at me or laugh.
September 16th, 2009 at 08:25 pm
so what did she end up doing? oh RIGHT, she doesn't exist ...
September 17th, 2009 at 07:00 pm
PWNT!!
September 16th, 2009 at 03:55 am
How could you not mention Steel Mutherfucken Dawn man! STEEL DAWN.
Like if The Samurai and Mad Max had a baby it would in Steel Dawn and Swayze was in it and he kicked ass, stabbing people with trick swords and knives and stuff.
September 16th, 2009 at 05:08 am
Probably because you're the only fucking person that ever saw that movie. In fact, I had to Google it just to see if it was a real movie.... Looks awesome. Not.
September 16th, 2009 at 07:20 am
what about outsiders! that was a badass movie
September 16th, 2009 at 08:17 am
What about Youngblood...? Although Rob Lowe did everything in his power to make it the most homoerotic sports movie ever, it's still a great hockey movie filled with fights, booze and Ms McGill. Ohhhhhh Ms McGill.
Derrek Sutton: "Here's to the game and getting out of this hick town! Thank God there is a sport for middle-sized white boys."
September 16th, 2009 at 03:53 pm
bottom line, Swayze mad some pretty badass films. and he himself is a total an complete badass and for that i say thank you Patrick Swayze for entertaining me for years and years to come. except 4 ghost and dirty dancing
September 16th, 2009 at 08:50 pm
hey fags just so you know the reason the USSR never invade the US was because they were afraid that with every household having an arsenal of private weapons, local militias would beat their tiny red army to pieces.
That and their whole piece of shit country would get nuked in ten minutes.
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