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Olive Garden Doesn’t Want Kendra Wilkinson

When I was looking for prom dates, I asked this girl out who sort of looked like a mix between Philip Seymour Hoffman and and that weird guy from ghost that teaches Patrick Swayze how to use his ghost powers and then freaks out and jumps in that subway. I did it because I figured there’s no way I’d get rejected. But when I asked her, she pretended like she didn’t hear me, then I repeated my question, and she went “what, I think, I’m gonna be-” and then just started running. My friend looked at me and was like “Dude, if you got rejected by her, I think you just have to start doing dudes now.” My point is, it’s always tough for the ego when someone or something incredibly undesirable rejects you. Wallstreetfighter.com reports:

It’s no secret that Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend Kendra Wilkinson LOVES her some Olive Garden. She plugs it often on the Girls Next Door show and elsewhere.

However, executives at Olive Garden would rather not be associated with the playmate. One exec said, “I don’t feel comfortable talking about this because it is a complicated issue for the brand.”

This coming from a restaurant where I once saw a woman lift a bowl filled with pasta above her head and then pour it down her throat like it was a cup of water handed to her while she was running the 18th mile of a marathon. Here’s how embarrassing this is for Kendra: I went and ate at the Olive Garden and the diarrhea I got afterwards released a statement saying “I’d rather not be associated with the Olive Garden. We’ll continue to have a working relationship but it’s a complicated issue for my brand.”

Well, if Olive Garden won’t take her…..I know one place that will.

8 Responses to "Olive Garden Doesn’t Want Kendra Wilkinson"

  1. Pratik says:

    Do girls with fake boobs even try to make them look real anymore? The ones on the girl in pink should be classified as “beyond blatant.”

  2. @Pratik says:

    I don’t understand. Those are clearly natural

  3. L says:

    I can see how it might interfere with their “when you’re here, you’re family” mentality.

    But anyone who would seriously boycott Olive Garden because of a Playboy bunny does not deserve to nosh on their subpar shrimp.

  4. J says:

    As a multi year / multi location ex-waiter for Red Lobster ( banned from being rehired lmao ) I must point out one thing.

    Olive Garden , Red Lobster , Smokey Bones & Bahama Breeze are all owned by the same company. Darden somethingoranother.

    They do have some damn hot girls working there but what do you expect when you hire mostly high school & college girls. All depends on the area you live in. Trust me taking a unauthorized break with the pretty hostess in the liquor room on the clock made up for retarded cheap ass people. Except for the last time.

    ps darden does not take kindly to the liquor room being used for anything other than the storage of liquor…..

  5. simon says:

    How many hours do you think Hef spends talking Jazz and censorship and Lenny Bruce with these silicon ho-bags?

  6. Boob Guy says:

    Yo, Pratik, Bridget has natural titties that’s just a push up bra she’s wearing.

  7. Anonymous says:

    you do know that olive garden and red lobster are both owned by darden restaurants? haha