I’ve done exactly one red carpet event, and that was so I could go to the Playboy Mansion. I’ll never do another because it’s pretty much the dumbest experience possible. You basically have to sit there and shout compliments to celebrities in hopes of them coming over and letting you talk to them for three seconds. I refused to partake, mostly because it’s tough to think of a compliment for somebody like Brendan Fraser. When Tila Tequila came by, I actually heard this reporter next to me go “Tila, you’re so talented! You look so beautiful,” then saw Tila evaluate the compliment in her brainless head, decide it was good enough, and then come over and talk to the reporter who shouted it. Then the reporter asks the question that she was dying to ask, which was “Tila, how do you do it, girl?!” And thus, the world gets dumber. Especially when people ask P. Diddy questions. Perezhilton.com reports:
During a recent interview, P. Diddy was asked if there was any new Olympic sport he might have a chance of winning, Diddy responded with, “Who could have sex the longest.”
He adds, “I think that’s an event I can do well in.
Diddy added, “Just so you know, that’s supposed to be funny. Even though I am serious.
I wish he had added, “so just to clarify; my statement reflects that I’m able to last so long during sexual intercourse that I would be able to compete at the highest level of a world tournmament, as well as also reflecting that I am indeed an incredibly humorous and witty person by insinuating that the Olympics, a place normally reserved for traditional sports, would have such an event. Thank you.”
As long as we’re thinking of waaaaacky olympic events that Puffy could win gold in, let’s propose another: