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Twelve-Year-Old French Boy Fakes Kidnapping, Leads Police on One-Month Investigation to Avoid Dentist

I'm sure his chain-smoking, yellow-toothed, menage a trois-having parents are proud.

By:|June 24, 2014


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The 10 Most ‘WTF?’ Face Tattoos in Mugshots

Two sets of bad decisions in one picture.

By:|June 23, 2014


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Today’s Must-See: Musicless Music Videos

Did you know that when you remove the music from music videos, they become totally absurd and surreal? I mean, obviously you knew that, but here's proof.

By:|June 20, 2014


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Christian Grey From ’50 Shades of Grey’ Has Been Revealed, And Man Is He Boring

Pictures of the actor from 50 Shades of Grey in costume have finally been revealed. Sadly (and predictably), he's a bland, boring brunette. They could've really spiced up this stupid character, and they chose to take him plain. No salt or pepper even.

By:|June 20, 2014


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18 Photos of Sexy Dutch Soccer Fans

The host country of the 2014 FIFA World Cup might claim the sexiest soccer fans in the world, but the Netherlands fans have gotten off to a very strong start this year.

By:|June 19, 2014


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Topless Model Sophie Dalzell Thinks Her Boobs “Are More Important Than the Law,” Turns Out to Be Right

It's like this chick is actively trying to steal the title of "World's Worst Female" away from Farrah Abraham.

By:|June 18, 2014


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5 Ways Game of Thrones Could Actually Surprise Us Going Forward

Game of Thrones has been doing the brutal death deal for four seasons now. How long can it possibly go on before people get the point and move on to something else? If HBO wants this show to actually make it to the end of the novels (whenever the fuck that is), they need to alter the recipe a bit.

By:|June 18, 2014


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Classic Crush: 16 Photos of Christy Canyon, “Golden Era” Porn Star

Check out of our favorite photos of Christy in the gallery above, and if you have a suggestion for a future installment of Classic Crush, shoot it to us on twitter @HolyTaco.

By:|June 17, 2014


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Sexy Female Drummers Playing Metal Covers: A Video Tribute

There's something strangely attractive about a woman dominating the drums. Maybe it's the unbridled passion — the sheer, ecstatic fury of their performances. Maybe I just like girls with calluses on their hands.

By:|June 17, 2014


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This Girl Doesn’t Look a Thing Like Elsa From ‘Frozen’. Shut Up.

Anna Faith Carlson is taking the Internet by storm, thanks to a picture of her standing next to a cutout of Elsa, the Ice Queen from Frozen. According to the Internet, she looks exactly like Elsa, which is an amazing feat that she should be lauded and commended for apparently. Except she doesn't look like Elsa. At all.

By:|June 16, 2014


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Nine Victims From the Friday the 13th Series Who Totally Had It Coming

Jason Voorhees is the *real* victim here, and there must have been something those pot-smoking sexual delinquents were doing to warrant such brutal and horrific deaths at his hands...

By:|June 13, 2014


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Jemima Packington, the Asparagus Psychic [VIDEO]

Jemima Packington is a British soothsayer who claims to be the world's only "asparamancer". Since she had to coin the term herself, we believe her. Nobody else would use stalks of asparagus to predict the damned future, but that's exactly what she does.

By:|June 13, 2014


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Foria: The THC Sex Lube That Horny Potheads Have Been Waiting For

Your two most favorite things in the world — finally combined!

By:|June 13, 2014


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Holy Taco Bad Book Club: The Mole With Poop on His Head

"The Story of the Little Mole Who Went in Search of Whodunit" is a story about shit. A mole gets pooped on and searches for the culprit, all while learning important lessons on how every animal that poops right in front of him does so differently.

By:|June 13, 2014


steak-oreo

Brainstorming Wacky Oreo Flavors is Harder Then You Think

One might think coming up with wacky Oreo ideas is easy. Turns out it's actually as difficult as any other creative venture, especially when you pitch a terrible idea and Nabisco is forced to break out the Whipping Cane to teach you a lesson.

By:|June 12, 2014


dan-whitney

Great Failures From The Past: Not Larry the Not Cable Guy

Larry the Cable Guy used to be an ultra-cheesy early '90s standup comic named Dan Whitney. And if you thought Larry was annoying, he's actually an improvement over Dan, who might have been the unfunniest person ever. Puppies abandoned under a bridge earn more giggles than this guy.

By:|June 12, 2014


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Sexy Contortion Videos: Your New Fetish

There's nothing sexier than a woman who can sit on her own head.

By:|June 11, 2014


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Dear False Flaggers: Turns Out, Those Flags are EVERYWHERE

Dear False Flag enthusiasts: you're on the right track, but you're not going far enough with their paranoia. It's not just terrorist attacks and school shootings that are set up by shady politicians to justify taking away your basement full of AK-47s. It's EVERYTHING. Your government has false-flagged your entire existence, from the moment you wake up to the moment you wake up again.

By:|June 11, 2014


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The 2014 Naked Bike Ride Season — Everything You Need to Know

Boobs, balls and bikes. On display for all.

By:|June 11, 2014


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6 Fun Things Pete Rose Should Do While Managing for a Day

Pete Rose is managing an independent baseball team called the Bridgeport Bluefish for a day, because publicity. He should screw around and have some quick and dirty fun with his post, and here are a few ways he can do so. After all, what are they going to do, fire him?

By:|June 11, 2014


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