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The 4 Words We Won’t Say (and why we should)

Language is a funny thing – it’s essentially what makes us human and defines every aspect of our external and even internal worlds. Without an understanding of what a thing is and how to signify that thing, we have no common ground between us. It’s nearly impossible to even imagine a world in which you have no language to identify things – no ability to even understand the colors or shapes of the things you see, the act of seeing itself or the feelings things evoke – all of which require language for us to understand. Given all that, it’s even more bizarre that we have words we generally refuse to use. Let’s check some out!

By:|February 22, 2012


The Morning Jolt: Finnish Boob Love

This is the husband of the President of Finland. He clearly loves boobs.

By:|February 22, 2012


A Factual Explanation of Fat Tuesday

Today is Mardis Gras Day, or "Fat Tuesday" in case you didn't know. That's the holiday about boobs. At least, that's how most people know of it. There's also donuts involved in some cultures. That sounds perfect. Boobs, booze and donuts. Why would you want to complicate everything surrounding this holiday with facts and history? We don't really want to, but we feel an obligation to. Partying for partying's sake is something you do when you're in your college years, or if you pursue writing as a career, your college years, plus five or six years following college. We're not trying to spoil that for you, or ruin your buzz, we just want to arm you with Mardis Gras facts so that you're a little more justified in your debauchery.

By:|February 21, 2012


The 100 Best Nic Cage Quotes

How'd it get Burned!  How'd it get BURRRRNNNED!  Our friends at Filmdrunk will show you how with Nic Cage's best 100 quotes.

By:|February 21, 2012


These Japanese Fart Scrolls Are The Best Historical Artifacts About Farts You’ll Ever See

The scrolls go by the name of He-Gassen, which means “Fart Battle,” which is the potential title for a movie that I would pay to watch many times over. The scrolls feature various Japanese men and women attacking each other with farts in ways so unique I’m genuinely surprised we haven’t seen any of them unintentionally ripped-off in Adam Sandler movies.

By:|February 21, 2012


GIF Attack!

This might be the most profane and immature GIF Attack yet. Every time you scroll down, you will be scrolling your way through history.

By:|February 21, 2012


25 People Who Aren’t Getting the Job

Ever heard the term "unemployable?" These people probably have, too.

By:|February 21, 2012

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Tweets from Celebrity Pets

Each and every day on Twitter you can read the thoughts or lack of thoughts of celebrities. We figured it'd be more insightful to check out what the pets of celebrities have to say, since they're the ones with all the inside info. To the tweets!

By:|February 21, 2012


The Morning Jolt: Watch Out for that Mountain

They bleep the swearing at the end of this. But make no mistake, this is cause for swearing.

By:|February 21, 2012


Presidential Tattoos For President’s Day

It’s President’s Day, so what better time to view a gallery of people with silly-ass presidential tattoos than now? Thank you, Regretful Morning!

By:|February 20, 2012


How To Make A Test-Tube Hamburger

Are you hungry now but are tired of the immediacy of today’s foods? Are you looking for long-form cooking that integrates the arts of stem cell manipulation and slapping Mother Nature’s dumb, leafy face? Of course you are! Thanks to the wonders of modern science, you can now prepare a lab-grown hamburger of your own for the ultra-low price of 250,000 Euros.

By:|February 20, 2012


Snowbound In Your Car For Two Months: WWHTD?

Somewhere just south of the Arctic Circle, forty-four year old Peter Skyllberg, ended up trapped in his snow-covered car for TWO MONTHS! That's a really long time. Seriously inconvenient. He was probably paying rent on his apartment for those two months. I mean, it's seriously impressive and all, but what a waste of money. It took him that long to accidentally be discovered by some snowmobilers who thought they'd come across a wrecked vehicle. Luckily, they peeked inside (probably looking for loose change and iPods) and they found a barely living Skyllberg. WOW! GROSS! That' got us to thinking: What if we were trapped in our car for two months? What would we do to survive and pass the time?

By:|February 20, 2012


5 Things We’d Like to see in the World of Warcraft: Mists of Pandaria

If you weren’t aware, insanely popular online game World of Warcraft is expanding yet again with Mists of Pandaria, a new game expansion that focuses on Kung Fu Panda and how you can beat up goblins and such while being a Kung Fu Panda.

By:|February 20, 2012


Classic Taco: The 8 Worst Bosses to Work For

Between having to show up at work and having to actually do work, no one likes having a job. But it doesn't get any worse than working for one of these eight annoying bosses.

By:|February 19, 2012


Sunday Comics

Sunday bloody Sunday....comics.

By:|February 19, 2012


Holy Taco Draws the News: Chris Brown

Extra Extra, Chris Brown is a doucher! Anyway, we drew the story for you so you don't have to read much.

By:|February 18, 2012


7 Movies That Would Make Horrible Musicals

What?  Why wouldn't The Human Centipede Musical be great?  Fine, Smosh, you win.

By:|February 17, 2012


Holy Taco Hero: A Real Live, Terrifying Mountain Man

If you're a cabin owner in Utah, your wives are scared for their lives right now. As they should be, and so should you. Why? Because there's a for real for serious, insane mountain man roaming the wilderness of southern Utah. He sleeps in the woods most of the time, but during the winter, he seeks out vacant cabins and inhabits them.

By:|February 17, 2012

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Report: Taco Bell Amassing Army of Doritos Taco Shells

It is being reported that Taco Bell, the nation’s leading provider of food you regret eating at 2 am when all other restaurants are closed, has amassed an army of 85 million Doritos taco shells that they will unleash upon the world in March.

By:|February 17, 2012


25 Memorable Wieners

It's Friday and that means it's probably time for a whole gallery of phallic, processed meat food!

By:|February 17, 2012