Most Powerpoint Presentations we deal with each day are about things that are really, really boring. So we made a Powerpoint about something we all really want to learn about. Enjoy! (Hit the big right arrow button to see the next page.)
There are some damage control efforts that can be made.
1. Subtle yet deep inhalation with pin-point exhalation away from company repeated over and over might possibly reduce that scent number by 5 to 10. This filtration method is virtually worthless but can net some results if combined with #2.
2. Light that smoke but ignite the lighter a little early and let it extinguish a little late. Allow the flame to go out just before the cig is lit to pave the way for additional burn time.
3. Hold it until someone around you bends over or squats. There will be unspoken judgments made and you will likely skate by the event unless the bender/squatter gets vocal.
aside: Being a chap whose emissions are mostly bark and little bite, I have enjoyed an espionage style life of public farting by way of employing the aforementioned cheek lift/spread. My fortune ran out on the day I tried this technique in a Subway sandwich joint. The curved bench served as an amplifier and sounding board. Where I expected the usual stealthy shoosh of release there was instead the angry, lengthy "wrong answer" buzz shouting its birthing announcement to every ear in the place. It was louder than I could reproduce were I to try mimicking it for you. This handy PPP would have helped me little on that dark day.
id rather just let one rip while making gun jesters with my hands and if anyone confronts/objects to my massive ass bomb reply with the all too appropriate "fucking duck, good thing i shot him"
(2 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
June 25th, 2009 at 12:13 pm
There are some damage control efforts that can be made.
1. Subtle yet deep inhalation with pin-point exhalation away from company repeated over and over might possibly reduce that scent number by 5 to 10. This filtration method is virtually worthless but can net some results if combined with #2.
2. Light that smoke but ignite the lighter a little early and let it extinguish a little late. Allow the flame to go out just before the cig is lit to pave the way for additional burn time.
3. Hold it until someone around you bends over or squats. There will be unspoken judgments made and you will likely skate by the event unless the bender/squatter gets vocal.
aside: Being a chap whose emissions are mostly bark and little bite, I have enjoyed an espionage style life of public farting by way of employing the aforementioned cheek lift/spread. My fortune ran out on the day I tried this technique in a Subway sandwich joint. The curved bench served as an amplifier and sounding board. Where I expected the usual stealthy shoosh of release there was instead the angry, lengthy "wrong answer" buzz shouting its birthing announcement to every ear in the place. It was louder than I could reproduce were I to try mimicking it for you. This handy PPP would have helped me little on that dark day.
June 26th, 2009 at 11:10 am
id rather just let one rip while making gun jesters with my hands and if anyone confronts/objects to my massive ass bomb reply with the all too appropriate "fucking duck, good thing i shot him"
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