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President Bush Can’t Remember If He Did Cocaine

bush cocaine

In Scott McClellan’s new book, the former White House Press Secretary claims that our fearless leader can’t quite remember if he plowed through a few fat rails in his earlier partying days:

Writes McClellan: “‘The media won’t let go of these ridiculous cocaine rumors,’ I heard Bush say. ‘You know, the truth is I honestly don’t remember whether I tried it or not. We had some pretty wild parties back in the day, and I just don’t remember.’

“I remember thinking to myself, How can that be? How can someone simply not remember whether or not they used an illegal substance like cocaine? It didn’t make a lot of sense.”

First off, if you can’t remember whether you did it or not, then I’m pretty sure that means you did it. But this makes me wonder, if he can’t remember something as important as whether or not he snorted coke, then what else could he be forgetting? Here are a few other little tidbits that may have slipped the president’s mind:

  • Not sure if he’s ever tried Pop-Tarts.

  • Can’t recall if that chick in Total Recall had three or four boobs.
  • “Forgot” about Parent-Teacher Night in fourth grade.
  • Recollection hazy about how he got “I Love Cocaine When It Goes Up My Nose! Can you please give me some cocaine? Cocaine!” tattoo on small of back.
  • Can’t remember if he’s also supposed to not remember trying ‘shrooms.
  • Still can’t find car keys.
  • Is pretty sure he owned the Texas Rangers…but it could’ve also been New York Rangers.
  • Never knows if you “fall back” or “spring forward” or vice versa when it’s time to change the clocks.
  • Is that one Jenna or Barbara? I mean, seriously, they’re twins.
  • 13 Responses to "President Bush Can’t Remember If He Did Cocaine"

    1. Ada says:

      I’ve no idea how the American people could be so blind and ignorant to have this guy as president, Bush really is a complete joke. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was still doing drugs while he was in the white house, it might explain some of his actions. I suppose it’s good he didn’t say yes, if people are foolish enough to vote for him I’m sure they would copy him and think it’s ok to do cocaine. We would have a load of teenagers in drug rehabs saying they did it because the president did it.

    2. george says:

      As far as I can tell he didn’t deny nor admit snorting cocaine and still you guys seem to already have the answer. Put yourself in his position, there is no definitive answer to that question because you are targeted as a suspect for snorting anyways. So if you deny people won’t believe you anyways. We all know Bush had a drug history, he seems to had it handled now, he is a president so start judging him upon his current acts.

    3. </a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-37592">May 13, 2009 at 8:56 am</a></div> <p>Badly need your help. I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.<br /> I am from Scotland and bad know English, give true I wrote the following sentence: “Gm is trying to buy a large stake in russian car company avtovaz.Largest manufacturing company, the avtovaz auto works in tolyatti, while its main regional client is avtovaz, price waterhouse also works with”</p> <p>Best regards :p, Elliot.</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="li-comment-9458"> <div id="comment-9458" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Keeblerkahn</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9458">May 28, 2008 at 1:53 pm</a></div> <p>Bosco, I don’t think that we should bury our heads in the sand, but I also don’t think every Arab is our enemy. Bush lied, it’s a fact, deal with it.</p> <p>Go back to jacking off to 2 girls 1 cup, the adults are talking.</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="li-comment-9449"> <div id="comment-9449" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Whoopie</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9449">May 27, 2008 at 3:58 pm</a></div> <p>That PS… I lol’d</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="li-comment-9450"> <div id="comment-9450" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Keeblerkahn</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9450">May 27, 2008 at 4:38 pm</a></div> <p>In his defense, being president is a stressful job and I’m sure his mind is chalked full of ‘portain stuff’ as he likes to call it. Lets start with something only a few years old and see if he remembers. Mr. Bush, do you remember lying to the American people and the world to justify going to war with a country that had nothing to do with 9 11?</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="li-comment-9451"> <div id="comment-9451" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn"><a href='http://myspace.com/oakhill49' rel='external nofollow' class='url'>blake williams</a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9451">May 27, 2008 at 4:56 pm</a></div> <p>he did it. motherfucker still owes me 40 bucks for a gram</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="li-comment-9452"> <div id="comment-9452" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Bosco</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9452">May 27, 2008 at 7:44 pm</a></div> <p>Jeeeezus, Keeblerkahn you are a total douchebag. I’m so tired of hearing that tired old story about how Bush lied to America. You’re the type of person that thinks we can just bury our heads in the sand and everything will be fuckin peachy….well thats not reality fuckface.</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="li-comment-9453"> <div id="comment-9453" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Dave</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9453">May 27, 2008 at 7:59 pm</a></div> <p>In regards to the Rangers, could have owned a Range Rover, or a VHS copy of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers as well. 4 more years!!!</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="li-comment-9454"> <div id="comment-9454" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">JW</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9454">May 27, 2008 at 8:10 pm</a></div> <p>Whats with all these BORING political posts? I go to this site to get away from this SHIT!!</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="li-comment-9455"> <div id="comment-9455" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn"><a href='http://fu.com' rel='external nofollow' class='url'>billy bunghole</a></cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9455">May 27, 2008 at 8:13 pm</a></div> <p>that pic needs to be rocked on my desk top</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment odd alt thread-odd thread-alt depth-1" id="li-comment-9456"> <div id="comment-9456" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Reality</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9456">May 28, 2008 at 1:23 am</a></div> <p>Boscoe’s an inbred redneck</p> <p>Jesus guide my bullets!!!!!</p> </div> </li> <li class="comment even thread-even depth-1" id="li-comment-9457"> <div id="comment-9457" class="commentListBox "> <div class="comment-author vcard"> <cite><cite class="fn">Anonymous</cite> <span class="says">says:</span></cite> </div> <div class="comment-meta commentmetadata"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/president-bush-cant-remember-if-he-did-cocaine/#comment-9457">May 28, 2008 at 3:46 am</a></div> <p>You know Bosco, the internet can be used to find things that aren’t porn. You might want to try it sometime. Some people actually read and form there own opinions, I know it’s a lot harder than reading a bumper sticker to find who it is you think you should hate but you might want to give it a shot sometime.</p> </div> </li> </ol> </div> </div> <div id="column-right"> <div class="block"> <div id="re_ad_300x250"> <!-- begin ad-tag 300x250 --> <div id="div-gpt-ad-1362699458765-1"> <script type="text/javascript"> googletag.cmd.push(function () { googletag.display("div-gpt-ad-1362699458765-1"); }); </script> </div> <!-- end ad tag --> </div> </div> <!-- START OF THE PLAYER EMBEDDING TO COPY-PASTE --> <div id="mediaplayer" class="mediaplayer block"> <textarea class="lazyload-right"> <h2 class="heading"> This Street Fight Is So Well Filmed It’s Almost Art </h2> <div class="mediaplayerBox"> <iframe src="//break.com/embed/2655550?embed=1" width="300" height="250" webkitallowfullscreen mozallowfullscreen allowfullscreen frameborder="0"></iframe> </div> </textarea> </div> <!-- END OF THE PLAYER EMBEDDING --> </div> <br clear="all" /> </div> <!-- content end --> </div> <div class="footer_wraper"> <div class="footer"> <ul class="network_sites"> <li class="break"><a href="http://www.break.com/" target="_blank" title="Funny Videos">Break.com</a></li> <li class="mademan"><a href="http://www.mademan.com/" target="_blank" title="Men's Guide">Made Man</a></li> <li class="gamefront"><a href="http://www.gamefront.com/" target="_blank" title="Game Front">Game Front</a></li> <li class="screenjunkies"><a href="http://www.screenjunkies.com/" target="_blank" title="Movie Reviews">Screen Junkies</a></li> <li class="cagepotato"><a href="http://www.cagepotato.com/" target="_blank" title="MMA News">Cage Potato</a></li> <li class="chickipedia"><a href="http://www.mademan.com/chickipedia/" target="_blank" title="Hot Pictures">Chickipedia</a></li> <li class="holytaco last"><a href="http://www.holytaco.com/" target="_blank" title="Funny Stuff">Holy Taco</a></li> </ul> </div> </div> <script type="text/javascript"> if(typeof _brkPVO == 'undefined') var _brkPVO = 'pe=a&pi=1393'; (function() { var brkpv = document.createElement('script'); brkpv.type = 'text/javascript';brkpv.async = true;brkpv.src = 'http://media1.break.com/break/js/lamp/pageview.min.js?v=221'; document.body.appendChild(brkpv); })(); </script> <!--Plugin Missed Schedule 2013.0130.2222 Active - Key Tag: bkytCi8L522P8RbgYIlkQbL6Yz4JDvIWlTlXN5q776Yvq5t7gxkCvB643C7osdFV6--> <!-- Universal Footer --> <script type="text/javascript" data-site-id="HolyTaco" id="js-UniversalFooter"> (function() { var uf = document.createElement('script'), s = document.getElementById('js-UniversalFooter'); uf.type = 'text/javascript'; uf.src = '//cdn.sites.break.com/wp-content/themes/sites.break/universal-footer/UniversalFooter.js'; s.parentNode.insertBefore(uf, s); })(); </script> <div id="tracking" style="height:0px; width:0px; overflow:hidden;"> <!-- Start Comscore Beacon --> <script type="text/javascript"> document.write(unescape("%3Cscript src='" + (document.location.protocol == "https:" ? 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