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Romantic Comedies: A Primer For Men

Being well versed in the language of romance is incredibly important for the single man. But what may be more important is being well versed in the language of romantic comedies. The kind of movies you generally don’t watch unless there’s sexual activity at stake. We here at Holy Taco, being your ever faithful wingmen, have comprised a brief list of popular romantic comedies and what you need to know about them to appear sensitive and caring. It’s all the vital points without having to listen to Drew Barrymore’s voice for ninety minutes!

Each movie includes vital info, a plot summary plus discussion points and quotes for extra credit!

My Best Friend’s Wedding

Vital Info:
Starring: Julia Roberts, Dermot Mulroney & Cameron Diaz

Plot: Basically, Julianne (Julia Roberts) and Michael (Dermot Mulroney) have been besties forever. Totally platonic, nothing romantic. UNTIL Julianne finds out that Michael is getting married. She realizes that she’s been in love with him forever and decides she has to put a stop to the wedding.

Extra Credit:
Be sure to side with Julianne in all discussions concerning this film. She’s the victim/hero of the story. If you sat down and watched the entire film like I did  (in sweatpants, eating ice cream and drinking red wine) your initial thought would be “Too late, girlfriend!” but that’s the wrong thought. Every girl wants to marry their life-long best friend. As long as he’s of an equal level of attractiveness and social standing to them.

“This is my one chance at happiness. I have to be ruthless!” – Julianne

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My Big Fat Greek Wedding

Vital Info:
Starring: Nia Vardalos, John Corbett & Michael Constantine

Plot: Toula (Nia Vardalos) is unmarried at 30 (which doesn’t sound old to most of us, but to women that’s like sixty in “I’m not married yet” years). She works at her family’s restaurant for her father, who is insistent that she finds a nice Greek boy to marry. She eventually changes jobs and falls in love but WUH WOH! He’s not Greek! Quick, somebody smash a plate! They’re forced to date in secret while they learn to try and accept each other’s lives. Eventually they get married, in case you couldn’t tell by the title.

Extra Credit:
This was an indy film written by the lead actress. This film wasn’t quite as cutesy and gross as a lot of the others on this list, but it still culminates in a wedding. I’ve always considered it good dating practice to pretend you like things that culminate in weddings.

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27 Dresses
*You should really thank us for watching this one for you. It wasn’t easy.

Vital Info:
Starring: Katherine Heigl, James Marsden and Malin Akerman

Plot: Jane (Katherine Heigl) has been a bridesmaid 27 times (hence the title) and she’s constantly pretending to not care! She’s actually in love with her boss, George (Edward Burns), who ends up meeting her overachieving sister and then ends up falling in love with her WTF? I know?! That’s what I said! Turns out Jane’s sister was marrying this guy for all the wrong reasons, so the wedding never happens. Jane actually ends up with this other guy who was trying to put things in her since the beginning of the movie. Because he was the one who actually cared about her.

Extra Credit:
The movie is based on a character who is “always a bridesmaid, never a bride”. It’s a pretty well-worn saying in the unmarried-and-sulking-about-it crowd. Try and throw that in somewhere.

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Sleepless In Seattle

Vital Info:
Starring: Tom Hanks & Meg Ryan

Plot: Sam’s (Tom Hanks) son calls in to a radio station on behalf of his widowed father. It’s Christmas Eve, and Sam’s wife has passed from cancer some time ago, so he’s talking to the radio host. Givin’ them the sad puppy dog act and the offers start rolling in. One of them is from Annie (Meg Ryan) who is basically tired of her current fiance. They start this weird correspondence that’s kept going by Sam’s son. The rest of the movie is a constant back and for of “will they, won’t they” crap. Eventually they do. Obviously.

Extra Credit

Do not, I repeat DO NOT confuse this film with “You’ve Got Mail”. That was another Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan rom-com, but instead of writing letters, they’re emailing each other.

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When Harry Met Sally

Vital Info:
Starring: Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan

Plot: Harry (Billy Crystal) and Sally (Meg Ryan) end up on a long car ride together home from college. They kind of despise each other. Harry’s kind of a douche. They part ways. Five years later, they end up on a plane, they catch up, have a similar discussion about wether or not men and women can be friends, then part ways again. This happens a few more times until eventually they actually become friends. And of course, they end up diddling each other. They go ahead and grow apart once more for dramatic effect, but then end up getting married.

Extra Credit:

Probably the ultimate “I’ll eventually have sex with my best guy friend” story ever. Unfortunately for Harry, it took like twenty years. You can try and cite the scene where Meg Ryan fakes an orgasm during lunch, but that’s a pretty easy one. Your best bet here is probably to side with Sally and agree that men and women can actually be friends. Because you must first earn a woman’s trust before you can violate it by trying to grab her boob.

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We hope you find this brief guide useful. You may have to do some studying on your own if you really want to make it to the head of the class. But this should get you started. We intentionally left out the “Sex and the City” franchise because it’s too difficult to sit through. We tried making our intern do it, but he threatened to report us for creating an unsafe work environment.

9 Responses to "Romantic Comedies: A Primer For Men"

  1. DonkeyXote says:

    For me this post has as much use as tits on a bull ’cause I wouldn’t watch any of the aforementioned flicks.

    Nadda!

  2. BoomTown says:

    Can I hire you to go see romantic comedies with my girlfriend?

  3. jtews says:

    This article is here so you don’t have to watch any of these movies. It’s like Cliff’s notes.

    And yes, I will sit through romantic comedies with your girlfriend if you pay me. But I can’t promise that she won’t fall for me.

  4. Nickjaa says:

    When Harry Met Sally is actually a pretty good movie

  5. When In RomCom says:

    Maybe there should be a romantic comedy about a woman who has seen too many romantic comedies and has lost her grip on RL until her bestie comes along to save her.