Explore Holy Taco

Romo and Simpson Do Nasty Nerd Style

Here’s a question: What do thirteen year old boys and Tony Romo have in common? If you answered “they both jack off to Jessica Simpson on their computer,” you’d be right. I also would have accepted “They both have never won an NFL playoff game,” as well as “They both pray to God they don’t get a noticeable boner when they meet thirteen year old girls.” Celebslam.com reports:

While he’s away at training camp preparing for yet another disappointing season with the Dallas Cowboys, Jessica Simpson’s been keeping the romance alive in her relationship with Tony Romo by doing sexy webcam strips for him.

First of all, he’s already banged Jessica Simpson, so whacking it to a grainy video of her is like living in a chateau in Italy and moving back to an apartment in Kansas that’s next to an Olive Garden.  Secondly, masturbating to your girlfriend is sort of weird.  Masturbation is your time to imagine a situation involving women who would never have sex with you unless you imagined a scenario ridiculous enough to give them no other option.

Either way, I don’t think Romo is paying attention to her during these video jerking sessions.  I think his desktop probably looks a little more like this:

7 Responses to "Romo and Simpson Do Nasty Nerd Style"

  1. Jerry Jones says:

    Romo would love it if TO played center.

  2. Hooligan says:

    Fuck Tony Romo…I hope he gets butthole cancer

  3. bob says:

    aw don’t be upset ur girl looks like a linebacker instead of jessica simpson. Bet u he gets a win in the playoffs this year

  4. Anonymous says:

    your to skinny and thats not a good thing

  5. justin says:

    @Hooligan

    You should talk to the Make A Wish people, they have a deal with the NFL.

  6. JibberJabberOn says:

    Where’s a hacked IP link when you need it. Sooner or later Jess will screw up and send everyone on the net a free strip show (just like in American Pie).
    Now that everyone knows she does it it won’t be long ’til it’s made pub(l)ic.
    I wait with mastur(baited) breath.

  7. flibberflabber says:

    @JJ: You over thought (perhaps a first? sorry) that pun. It actually is spelled “bated” breath – which would have been outstanding wordplay. Unless your breath smells like Jessica, and then Tony will start following you around. And I’m with you; screw hacking an Apple Mac! Let’s work on nabbing this feed!


15 Terrifyingly Dumb Facebook Posts


The 15 Sexiest SNL Hostesses


Top 20 Most Shocking Girls


The 11 Dumbest Celebrity Tattoos


Parenting Fails


How to Make a McGriddle at Home


Sandra Lee Talks Dirty


6 Types of Girls You'll Meet on a reality Dating Show


7 Tiny Yet Terrifying Animals


5 Drinks No Man Over 25 Shall Order


Female Murderers You’d Probably Go Home With


15 Tattoo Fails


20 Hottest Photos of Kim Kardashian

Courtney Love & Muppet Sexual Assault

Playboy’s Big Dance March Madness Bracket Challenge


The Hottie Index