Ryan O’Neal And His Son Like Drugs

It’s really important to share bonding experiences with your father.  For instance, when I was 11 my dad decided to coach my little league team. The third game of the season we faced this pitcher who had a mustache and threw really hard and I told my dad I’d rather not bat against him.  My dad crouched down on his knees and said “Listen, that kid is really fat. Even if you strike out against him, which everybody already expects anyway, he’ll still be fat and you won’t. But if you pussy out and you don’t face him, he may be fat but you’ll be a skinny pussy like your cousins from Seattle.  Now grab your bat and do your thing.” I’m not sure to this day what that speech meant, but I don’t think I’ve ever felt as close to the old man as I did right then. I imagine Redmond O’Neal feels that way today about his father Ryan O’Neal. People.com reports;

Actor Ryan O’Neal and his son, Redmond, were arrested Wednesday at the actor’s Malibu, Calif., home for alleged drug possession, a sheriff’s spokesman confirms.

Upon searching the premises, the younger O’Neal was found in possession of narcotics. Later, a vial of drugs were found in the elder O’Neal’s bedroom. We believe the drugs found were methamphetamines.”

Good god, they were booked together.  On the awkward meter, where does “Being naked strip searched right next to your father who’s being naked strip searched” rate?  I think right below “Being adopted and finding out you just f-ed your biological mother.”  Eh, maybe pretty far below that actually.

For some reason this story makes me think of one of those 1980s montages where a father and son who weren’t getting along, finally spend a magical day together building a soap box racer, eating burgers, playing baseball, and riding double bicycles while smoking meth.