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Shia LaBeouf Version 2.0

If I was rich, I’d definitely have a chauffeur. Right now I’m broke, and I’m still looking in to how much it would cost me. I have a 99 Ford Ranger extended cab, and I could just put up a sheet to separate the front seats from those small side seats in the cab, and I’d just sit back there. And when I wanted to talk to my driver, I’d slowly pull the sheet down and make that noise that windows make when they role down, for effect. But Shia LaBeouf IS rich and thus could easily get someone else to make that window noise when he pulls down the sheet, or even a real window, and yet, chooses to do neither. People.com reports:

Shia LaBeouf, who was arrested for drunk driving Sunday after being involved in a car accident in Hollywood, is recovering from surgery.

LaBeouf, 22, was driving in Hollywood when his car was involved in a collision around 3 a.m.

Shia is currently recovering from extensive hand surgery with plans to return to work on the set of Transformers 2 within one month.

I’ve never had extensive surgery before, but if I did, I’d bring in a DVD of Face/Off and be like “can you do this?” and they’d be like “No, you can’t switch faces with someone,” and I’d be like “No, I meant can you make a movie with a completely ridiculous plot line that stars two of the biggest over-actors of our generation, and yet somehow make it super awesome?”

I’m hoping when LaBeouf went into surgery, the doctors were done and he was still out cold and one of them was like “God, I can’t f-ing stand this kid.” And the other surgeon was like “Yeah, me neither, but what are you gonna do, huh?” And then they stared at each other for a few seconds and then one of them was like “You thinking what I’m thinking?” Then Shia came out of surgery looking like this:

12 Responses to "Shia LaBeouf Version 2.0"

  1. Dr. says:

    Can’t fucking stand Shia LaDouche! FUCK!

  2. Constructicons says:

    He’s more than welcome to hop over to the Constructicon camp. We’re actually in the market for a new left arm…

  3. bobby Bobbington says:

    Man, i thought i was the only one who couldnt stand this little turd.

    He ruined Transformers for me. And i’m sure he’ll ruin more movies in the future.

  4. Chris says:

    That’s some Spielberg-esque CGI on the Shia picture. You’re getting awesome at Photoshop buddy. Keep up the good work.

  5. Dawud says:

    I would fight pookie for that turkey.

  6. tatom says:

    talk about ultimate star power with your leg as the guitar.

  7. Buddy Ice says:

    An RPG arm, whhaaaaat!?! Actually that would suck, airline security would be a bitch.

  8. Pratik says:

    I was totally expecting a small Optimus Prime to be one of Shia’s legs.

  9. Hooligan says:

    Face/Off WAS awesome…and the daughter chick was banging!

  10. Eli says:

    Am I the only one who fucking hates the term “over-acting”? It just seems like a very lame way to attempt to bash a movie..

    Shia looks like some sort of douchey, mutant version of Leonardo DiCaprio in that picture.

  11. Josh says:

    That picture is totally fake. The oven thing isn’t even plugged in.

  12. Man what a dirty stache….he should get a chainsaw for his hand. check us out http://www.thedrunkcanuck.com