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57% Of You Want Maria Sharapova

57% Of You Want Maria Sharapova

Game, Set, Match. The results are in from Wimbeldoher (good God, that was a terrible joke) and 58% of Holy Taco readers would rather bang Tennis Star and Model, Maria Sharapova than Model and Tennis enthusiast, Anna Kournikova. Now here’s ACT…

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Eva Mendes Loves To Do Drugs

Eva Mendes Loves To Do Drugs

They tried to make Eva Mendes go to rehab and she said, “No no…” oh wait. She said “yes yes yes.” According to DailyStab.com: Eva Mendes has entered rehab for substance abuse.  She is at the famous Cirque Lodge, near S…

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Orson Welles Drank His Face Off

Orson Welles Drank His Face Off

Getting drunk is one thing. But getting totally wasted right before you film a TV commercial is what separates the part-time drinkers from the life-destroying booze-aholics. Raise a toast to Orson this weekend…or the next time you have to fil…

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Hipsters Do Stupid Things

Hipsters Do Stupid Things

I really tried to think this was cool and interesting. I really did. But I couldn’t help but feel that if I was in Grand Central station when this was going on, I would have stood in the middle of them and yelled “HEY! Some guy is ou…

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Tony Soprano Gets Punchy With Fan

Tony Soprano Gets Punchy With Fan

The guy who plays Tony Soprano had a little bit of an altercation with an overzealous fan at JFK airport yesterday. Here’s how I imagine it went down:  Fan: Hey Tony! It’s Tony Soprano! Hey! Check it out! I love your show! I watch it al…

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ESPN’s Chris Berman Swears When He’s Angry

ESPN’s Chris Berman Swears When He’s Angry

Chris Berman Loses His Cool – Watch more free videos I enjoyed this video of an irate Chris Berman so much that I transcribed it. Somehow it makes it funnier to read along. According to ESPN’s Chris Berman: “When I’m doinR…

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Taco Belle: Denise Milani

Taco Belle: Denise Milani

Age: 27 Where you’ve seen her: Please don’t ask me any questions about Denise Milani. Too busy looking at photos. Tantalizing tidbit: I don’t know. I gave you her age, what more do you want? You want to know that she’s a Cze…

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Wipe Out Of Nerdy Proportions

Wipe Out Of Nerdy Proportions

Jm Sicotte crashed on a dirtsurfer – Watch more free videos First of all, I have no idea what these things are that they’re riding. If I’m gonna wipe out riding something, it’s gonna be something cool like a Harley or Jessica…

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Osama Bin Laden Lives In Colombia

Osama Bin Laden Lives In Colombia

Wow. This takes balls. My favorite part is that he thinks that as a security guard, if he dresses like Osama Bin Laden, instead of people being like “Holy Shit, that’s Osama Bin Laden!,” people will be like “Whoa, thatR…

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Britney Spears Back To The Crazy House

Britney Spears Back To The Crazy House

Every time Britney Spears tries to leave the hospital, THEY PULL HER BACK IN! Actually, she went willingly, I just wanted to make a Godfather III reference. Yesterday she admitted herself to Cedars-Sinai medical center for being crazy or drunk, o…

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NFL Teams Make Terrible Rap Songs

NFL Teams Make Terrible Rap Songs

Do you often mistake Jerry Rice for Jay-Z? Jim McMahon for Method Man? No, you don’t. That’s because in the 80s a few NFL teams thought it would be a good idea to make rap songs with repetitive lyrics, cheesy special effects and embarras…

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