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When Boobs Go Bad

jack

Any man on Earth with an interest in boobs (gay guys, go have a smoothie) can confirm that, at some point in time, in a conversation with a woman, you’ll be challenged with the spurious and confused notion that men just love boobs.

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Holy Taco’s Plot To Cash In On Holly Madison’s Newly Insured Breasts

Holly Madison

Former Hugh Hefner concubine Holly Madison recently had her breasts insured for $1 million by Lloyd’s of London. Or so you have been led to believe by the mainstream media. As with most things in life, the real story is much more complex. Hol…

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The Languages of Boobs: A Primer

The Languages of Boobs: A Primer

The English language is a wonderful and versatile thing. We have a word that describes douchebags (it’s douchebag) and a word for Olive Garden (rancid). But above all, we have words for breasts. Like 100 words for breasts. We even have another a…

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The Small Breast Support Group: A Holy Taco Exposé

man in bra

Some time ago on another website I shared with the world the tragic story of a website dedicated to help men with giant wangs get over their terrible handicap. The Large Penis Support Group. But there’s more to the world than wang and as a…

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I Banged Jessica Simpson and You Didn’t

I Banged Jessica Simpson and You Didn’t

By Tony Romo There’s no denying it; the Dallas Cowboys suck. We’re one and four. That’s only a game ahead of the Buffalo Bills, for crying out loud. And since I’m the quarterback, that means I suck. How can I look you in the…

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How to Care for Boobies

How to Care for Boobies

Every man worth his salt wants boobs. No offense gay guys who don’t like boobs, but that’s the fatal flaw in your whole gay game. There’s no boobs. And that’s why a gay guy will never walk on the moon. For the rest of us…

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Holy Taco Looks at Areolas

Holy Taco Looks at Areolas

We run a tight ship up in this bitch. We keep it clean and scholarly and relevant to today’s modern literati. You come to Holy Taco to learn, not to be inundated with internet detritus like your ebays and megapixels and bosoms. But is tha…

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The History of Boob Jobs

The History of Boob Jobs

Boob jobs are a wonderful thing. They offer pleasure, enjoyment, and amusement that the whole family can enjoy.  A good boob job can brighten your day with a tingly sensation in your balls, and a bad boob job can tickle your funny bone to no en…

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A User’s Guide to Boob Terminology

A User’s Guide to Boob Terminology

There are thousands of different words for boobs, but how do you know what term is appropriate for the situation you’re in?  Luckily, we’ve spent a lot of time talking about boobs, and we’ve created a handy User’s Guide …

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The Future Of Ping Pong Includes Breasts

The Future Of Ping Pong Includes Breasts

I’ve never sat down to watch a ping pong match in my entire life. But I’ve watched this mildly overweight girl play with ping pong balls at least six times, and I’m not ready to turn it off just yet. Whoever is president of the of…

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Denise Milani Is My New Breast Friend

Denise Milani Is My New Breast Friend

Denise Milani should be ashamed of herself. Her treatment of shirts is deplorable. There are people in Africa (and parts of Central America, according to my dad’s National Geographic magazine) who don’t even have shirts of their own and…

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