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25 Differences Between Canadian and American Thanksgiving

canada-thanksgiving-turkey

This weekend was Thanksgiving in Canada. Did you Canadians have Thanksgivng in October? Ya do now. But what’s the big idea, why a month early?

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25 Things the Canadian Penny Can Do Now That It’s Retired

penny_np

Canada has finally done what everyone with a pocketful of pennies looking for a quarter has wanted to do for ages – they’ve abolished the little copper shit. No longer will Canadians be forced to deal with pennies and the tight asses will forever l…

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The Story of Canadian Thanksgiving

beaver

Today is Canadian Thanksgiving and you may be wondering, why are Canadians allowed outside? You may also be wondering why their Thanksgiving is so damned early and, for that matter, did Canadian pilgrims land somewhere a month earlier and do the ex…

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The Inner Monologue of a Canadian Olympic Basketball Player During the Opening Ceremonies

coach_team_canada

Oh God. Just…ungh. How did we let this happen? I knew I should have called in sick. Or just smoked some weed or something, they would have disqualified me. What the hell am I doing here?

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Human Face Appears In Canadian Man’s Testicle Ultrasound

testy Happy

  Having a pain in your testicle is one of the most terrifying experiences in a man’s life. A single soft, wispy graze on a testicle can cause a man to crumple to the ground like his belly button is a black hole and he’s being sucked in to him…

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Holy Taco Interview: Chuck D. from The Salads

The Salads

We’ve got a bunch of twitter followers, and some of them are famous. Never one to let a good thing go to waste, we put our famous followers to work by getting them to answer a series of (mostly) inane questions to get to know them a little bi…

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The Day I Got My Ass Kicked by Bonhomme

french snowman

Montreal, Quebec is an awesome town if you can get past the French. Most people discount French Canadians out of hand simply because what could they possibly have to offer the world besides baguettes and women who refuse to groom themselves with a…

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Your Pet Is Now Worthless: Meet Bailey the Beer-Drinking Bison

Your Pet Is Now Worthless: Meet Bailey the Beer-Drinking Bison

I bet you people think your pets are pretty hardcore, don’t you? I see the way some of you walk around town with your pitbulls on giant chains thinking you’re king s**t of f**k mountain. And let’s not forget those of you with more…

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Elderly Canadians Piss Away $11 Million Dollars

Elderly Canadians Piss Away $11 Million Dollars

Meet Allen and Violet Large. At first glance, they seem like your typical elderly couple. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll quickly find something much more sinister. For starters, they’re Canadian. I wish that was the biggest problem…

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5 Things for Which Canadians Should Be Thankful

5 Things for Which Canadians Should Be Thankful

O Canada! For those of us who are blessed with American citizenship, today is just another crappy Monday (unless you work at a bank, in which case, happy Columbus Day). But for our unfortunate brothers and sisters born north of the border, the seco…

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