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The Holy Taco Christmas Box of Chocolates Map

HTBOX

Every year, millions of pounds of chocolate get shoveled down the gullets of holiday revelers. 9 times out of 10 we don’t even know what we’re eating, but that 10th time we get that helpful little guide that tells you what’s in t…

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The Ten Worst Things To Get While Trick-Or-Treating

Apple

In what seemed like the longest Halloween weekend ever, we’re sure you found the time to make it out to wander the neighborhood (by yourself or with your kids) and ask for unhealthy handouts. In the fury and rush that is trick-or-treating, yo…

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25 of the Worst Treats to Give Out on Halloween

sweethearts candy

You have less than a week to build your stockpile of Halloween crud, 25% of which you will give out to neighborhood kids, the rest of which you’ll eat yourself. Just please, choose wisely. No one wants this crap.

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Australia Investigates Red M&Ms Bullying Tactics and Its Effect On Children. No, Seriously.

M&M Bitches

With the world falling apart, it’s good to know that there is a group of people in this crazy place called Earth that spent two months “investigating the social interactions on talking M&Ms in commercials”, as this article from Australia’s News…

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The 7 Best Kinds of Candy From Back in the Day

oompah loompahs

I have a preoccupation with nostalgia because I’m convinced that once I master time travel I’ll know more about the 80’s than the people in the 80’s when I get there, and I’ll have an iPhone, so I’ll be elected King and get tons of 80’s tang. But …

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A Letter From An 8 Year Old on The Subject Of Bad Halloween Candy

A Letter From An 8 Year Old on The Subject Of Bad Halloween Candy

I may be only 8 years of age, unable to understand many of life’s complex twists and turns, but I know bullsh*t when I see it, and I see it every year in the form of terrible Halloween candy. For one night a year – which in actuality is…

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I F***ing Hate Halloween

I F***ing Hate Halloween

By Mr. Tinylegs God damn, do I hate Halloween. I hate it so f***ing much! I hate it more than cats! I hate it more than the friggen vacuum cleaner! I hate it more than that dude who shows up once a day and shoves paper through that slot in the door…

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5 Snacks That Lacerate Your Mouth

5 Snacks That Lacerate Your Mouth

Experimentation is the mother of bisexuality, or something like that.  Or maybe science is the furious master of experimentation.  Hell if we know.  But we do know that there’s truth in the belief that some foods are more danger…

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Most Anticipated Candy of the Year!

Most-Anticipated-Candy-Year

Hot Girls With Ripped Abs (TotalProSports) Hot Blondes In Sports (BleacherReport) This Girl Needs A Hot Cup of Dick (Manofest) Finding The One Night Stand Girl (Coed) Lyndsey Fonseca Hotness (Maxim) Stephen Segal Gets Sex Slave Coverage (Asylum) How…

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What To Do With Leftover Peeps

What To Do With Leftover Peeps

  Marshmallow Peeps are a staple of the Easter Candy Catalog. The only problem is that there’s so much Peep goodness in every box that a normal human being can never finish them all.  Luckily, we’ve discovered an awesome game …

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That Explains The Face, But What About The Lack of Talent?

Explains-Face-What-About-Lack-Talent

18 Hot Chicks with Camel Toes [pics] (TotalProSports)   Winter Activities For Dudes (MadeMan)   Montoya and his Tacos (AllLeftTurns)   Captain Kirk knows how to Climb (ScreenJunkies)   Hot Cheerleaders of 2010 (Coed)   The M…

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