child – Holytaco

An Analysis of CNN.com’s “9 things you shouldn’t say to your child”

I like to visit CNN.com to get my daily dose of whatever those idiots think news is. Amid numerous Casey Anthony articles and Twitter poll questions, I came upon an article titled “9 Things You Shouldn’t Say To Your Child.” It’s all about one…

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10 Schwarzenegger-Worthy Movie Pitches to Explain How He Came to Father an Illegitimate Child

posted 05/18/2011
by Ian Fortey

Long ago, in a land of myth and legend, a lone warrior strode the land, looking for a kingdom to make his own and seeking revenge on the evil that destroyed his family. Now, after years of searching, his travels bring him to a dark kingdom rule…

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The Child Endangerment Skills of a Ninja!

posted 03/11/2011
by Luis Prada

In the dead of night, in 20 degree weather, Ross M. Hurst took to the streets of Scottdale, Pennsylvania, to dispense his particular brand of karate justice to the seedy criminal underbelly of rural Pennsylvania, which probably only consists of a c…

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A Recession Era Letter To Santa

posted 12/17/2010
by Luis Prada

With Christmas just around the corner we tend to forget that there are people in this world, even in our own cities, that are less fortunate than us. The economy has been rough for the past few years and people are trying to find new ways to live w…

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The Logic Of A Child As He Attempts To Run Away From Home

posted 11/05/2010
by

Mom, I will be fine. As a person of the age of 5, I believe I am more than capable of making it on my own on the rough and tumble streets. I have watched many an episode of Sesame Street and I have learned to find joy in the act of reading via Read…

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Babies & Kittens!

posted 04/01/2010
by

Have you ever seen anything so adorable in your entire life? This video has it all! Kittens! Babies! That’s pretty much everything, right?! The Adorable Six-Fingered Baby! (TotalProSports) The 25 Cutest Kitten Photos Ever! (Supe…

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Tacos & Babies Go Hand in Hand

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Inner Monologue of an 8-Year Old Opening Christmas Presents

posted 12/28/2009
by

Awwww shit! It’s Christmas morning! Hell yeah! In order to celebrate this festive and exciting day, I’m going to do the most dangerous thing that a child can do in a dark house early in the morning when everyone else is still aslee…

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Guest Column: You Are All a Bunch of Buttholes

posted 12/16/2009
by

Like most kids, my favorite time of year is Christmas time. I don’t understand why Thanksgiving is so great, and I can’t wait until it’s over because that means it’s almost time for Christmas. That’s the t…

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The Ol’ Roofie In The Eggnog Trick!

posted 12/10/2009
by

There’s Jizz on Her Shoes! [pics] (TotalProSports) The Stuntman Dream Job (MadeMan) The Funniest Video Of The Day (AllLeftTurns) The Weirdest Christmas Cards Ever (ScreenJunkies) Clay Guida’s T-Shirt Is Amazin…

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