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5 Toppings I Never Want to See on a Burger

Burgers

Burgers are awfully close to the world’s most awesome food. There’s tacos, there’s wings, there’s properly made barbecue and there’s burgers. Yes these are all meats because as much as I enjoy a nice cherry, it ain’t meat. Something needs to no l…

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The 4 Saddest Canned Foods Ever

canned food

This article needs to be clarified right off the bat. It’s not about gross canned foods, there are lots of those articles out there showing off pig brains and canned duck penis and who knows what else. This is focused on foods that are just depres…

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Killing Me Softly with Grease: Fair Food

Gator BBQ-0549

Every year I attend my local county fair and attempt to punish my insides for their blatant cowardice and insistence on hiding away inside me like fearful babies. Well insides, you’ve never won the battle yet and this year was no different.

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An Open Letter to the Non Toilet Trained

Toilet

Hey there, dribble guts, how goes it? That’s rhetorical, I’m well aware of your problems, at least a few of them. And that’s kind of why we need to talk.

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25 Reasons to Stay Home This Spring Break

head

Spring Break is a wild party. But it’s also this stuff. Beware.

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5 of the Most Disgusting Diseases You Can Get

sick boy

You’re pretty gross. Don’t take that as an insult, it’s the general “you” that means everyone. We are all gross. Except Scarlett Johansson who is fantastic. But the rest of us are so full of fluids, gasses and semi-solids that have no business exis…

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What’s In a TV Dinner?

What’s In a TV Dinner?

Because yesterday was Thanksgiving, we spent most of the day passed out on a bean bag chair. But midday through the day our old friend Swanson was there to ensure we had a hot meal, after only minutes in the microwave. And as we feasted on the co…

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The Journey to Find the 5 Best Chicken Wings on Earth

The Journey to Find the 5 Best Chicken Wings on Earth

Chicken wings are delicious and manly, we know this because flightless birds died to satiate our hunger for their useless limbs by the plateful. Vegetarians weep every time a Monday 25 cent wing night rolls out and, frankly, that’s OK. But …

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Burger King Challenges the Double Down

Burger-King-Challenges-Double-Down

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The Best Way To Experience an Old Man’s Colon

Best-Way-Experience-Old-Mans-Colon

Poop Chute

Poop-Chute

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