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How to Make Love

sex

So, you’ve decided to stick it to genetics and luck and try your hand at sweet, sweet coitus, good for you. The sex act, or porking, is one of the most satisfying ways to spend a commercial break man has ever devised. It provides a level of closen…

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Getting Into Your Pants: The Holy Taco Pants Guide

pants

Research tells us that you, Holy Taco reader, are likely wearing pants. In fact, 67% of you wear pants when you read our site. OR DO YOU?!?! You do. But are they really pants? Or are they trousers? Or some other leg-embracing textile we don’t…

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How To Celebrate Columbus Day

Columbus Day

Columbus Day is right around the corner, and the fact that you don’t care is very telling. It could be that you realize you didn’t get the full story of Columbus’ discovery of the new world when you were a kid, and you feel society let you down. So…

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How to Cook A Placenta

spaghetti-meat-sauce

For the past couple of days the internet has been abuzz with placenta talk. For the love of all that is good and pure in this world, I don’t know why. (Although, it may having something to do with this). But people have been searching it and that m…

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How To Walk Somewhere Without Dying

Group Walking_cropped

We are a nation that has become lazy. We’re fat and lazy. To combat this, Michelle Obama began a program known as “Get Moving,” which is a simple and effective program that promotes the somewhat absurd idea of actually using your legs to transport …

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An Alcoholic’s Guide To New Years

champagne party guy

New years eve is that one special time of year when we gather with our friends and family to usher in the dawning of a new period of our lives. It’s the time to make fresh starts, make new promises to ourselves, and celebrate the year that was by h…

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