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Too Damn Hot: A Poem

hot

Because it’s too damn hot. I wrote tis poem.

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Those Cold Blue Eyes Are Making Your Nipples Hard

Those-Cold-Blue-Eyes-Are-Making-Your-Nipples-Hard

Looks Like She’s Next To A Giant Waffle Cone

Looks-Shes-Next-Giant-Waffle-Cone

I’d Pick That

Id-Pick

Double Trouble

Double-Trouble

Booooootay!

Booooootay

She’s Probably Legal

Shes-Probably-Legal

Hi Boobs.

Hi-Boobs

Most People Just Stick Out Their Thumb

Most-People-Just-Stick-Out-Their-Thumb

Inner Monologue of a Single Guy at the Grocery Store

Inner Monologue of a Single Guy at the Grocery Store

Okay, it’s Monday night.  Most of the people going grocery shopping on a Monday night are single, and I don’t think I’m the only one that understands this.  You can also go shopping on Thursday night if you’re singl…

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Horizontal Stripes Make You Look Fat

Horizontal-Stripes-Make-You-Look-Fat

Inner Monologue of a Guy Attending the Porn Convention

Inner Monologue of a Guy Attending the Porn Convention

Aaaah. There’s nothing like a nice, relaxing weekend in Vegas. No screaming kids to drive to soccer games. No nagging wife bitching about how I bought the wrong eggs at the supermarket. Just me, the porn convention, and about 600 beautiful wom…

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