Lists – Holytaco

The Importance Of Remembering Ernest

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by Jim Tews

Did you watch the “Ernest” movies starring the late Jim Varney? We did, which is why we haven’t made much of ourselves. Regardless of our accomplishments, these videos have been cracking us up all day. We hope they’ll do the…

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7 New Job Ideas for Brad Childress

posted 11/22/2010
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Poor Brad Childress. Last year, he was one game away from the Super Bowl. Today, he’s sitting with Wade Phillips in the unemployment line. But I believe that when life gives you lemons, you should chuck those lemons right at life’s head…

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7 Celebrity TSA Body Scans

posted 11/19/2010
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The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) is catching a lot of flack for its use of body scanners at airports. While the government claims the nearly naked images produced by the machines cannot be leaked to the public, privacy advocates are…

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12 Ridiculous Vibrators That Really Exist

posted 11/18/2010
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Despite what the commentors say, I’m a straight guy. As such, I’ve never had much experience with vibrators. It’s not that I’m confident in my ability to satisfy a woman. Far from it. It’s just that I never cared enoug…

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8 As-Seen-On-TV Products in My Grandma’s House Right Now

posted 11/17/2010
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Those who know me know I like to feign horrible illnesses, injury and incarceration to avoid family gatherings and the like, mostly due to my family being the sorts of people who shame trailer parks and shanty towns everywhere. Still, they’r…

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7 Bill Clinton Cameos We’d Like to See (Besides ‘The Hangover Part II’)

posted 11/15/2010
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Screen Junkies is reporting that former President Bill Clinton has filmed a cameo for The Hangover Part II. It’s not everyday that a raunchy comedy lands an ex-president in its cast. But perhaps Clinton’s appearance will start a trend. …

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5 Businesses That Should Have Drive-Thru Windows (Besides Sex Shops)

posted 11/10/2010
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Welcome to Huntsville, Alabama, home of the world’s first drive-thru sex shop. Pleasures, the shop in question, recently moved into their new location, a former bank with a three-lane carport. According to the store’s press release, sex…

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7 Possible Culprits Behind the Mystery Missile Launch

posted 11/09/2010
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Yesterday, just before sunset, there was a missile launch off the coast of Los Angeles (click here for details). The government is claiming that it has no idea who conducted the launch of what some experts speculate may have been an ICBM. While the…

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7 Types of Trick-or-Treaters You Had Last Night

posted 11/01/2010
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Last night was Halloween and if you’re like us, you spent the night shouting obscenities from your basement apartment window, dressed in a bathrobe and drinking Kahlua and Kool-Aid. But other people were dressed, upstairs, handing out candy …

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The Sorry State of Hell: 5 Lame-Ass Demonic Possessions

posted 10/29/2010
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Rumor has it the very notion of an exorcism was all but forgotten by the early 1970’s. The Church had abandoned it in every civilized corner of the globe and most people were only passingly familiar with the term at all, in much the same way…

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18 Halloween Costume Alternatives For The Poor And Lazy

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Our Halloween guest article is by C. Coville, Betty Cameron and Andrew Bailey. They are funny peoples and will not shave your back. So you’re looking for a costume to wear this Halloween, but you’re too cheap and/or indolent to mak…

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A Response to AskMen.com: Holy Taco’s 5 Least Influential Men

posted 10/26/2010
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Click the pic above to see the full list at AskMen.com Today, Ask Men released their annual list of The 49 Most Influential Men. Any list of this sort is bound to cause controversy, as the topic itself is extremely subjective. But with a few except…

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The Importance Of Remembering Ernest

7 New Job Ideas for Brad Childress

7 Celebrity TSA Body Scans

12 Ridiculous Vibrators That Really Exist

8 As-Seen-On-TV Products in My Grandma’s House Right Now

7 Bill Clinton Cameos We’d Like to See (Besides ‘The Hangover Part II’)

5 Businesses That Should Have Drive-Thru Windows (Besides Sex Shops)

7 Possible Culprits Behind the Mystery Missile Launch

7 Types of Trick-or-Treaters You Had Last Night

The Sorry State of Hell: 5 Lame-Ass Demonic Possessions

18 Halloween Costume Alternatives For The Poor And Lazy

A Response to AskMen.com: Holy Taco’s 5 Least Influential Men

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