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If You Want to Make It On Wall Street, Never Invest in WWE

hhh-kelly-kelly

WWE stock dropped 43% overnight, a bigger crash than what triggered the Great Depression. They promised millions of WWE Network subscribers and a billion-dollar TV deal, and neither happened. Amazing what happens when a company that lies for a livin…

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25 Things the Canadian Penny Can Do Now That It’s Retired

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Canada has finally done what everyone with a pocketful of pennies looking for a quarter has wanted to do for ages – they’ve abolished the little copper shit. No longer will Canadians be forced to deal with pennies and the tight asses will forever l…

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How to Spend Your Lottery Winnings

lottery-winner

So, you’ve decided to win the lottery, good for you! It’s a fast and efficient way to get rich with very little effort, we’re surprised more people haven’t thought f it. Millions of dollars for the price of a cup of coffee or a candy bar or whatev…

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How Much Is Your Body Worth?

self-worth-tattoo

Money is big news. Unemployment, the 99%, shady business dealings, overpaid athletes, the world is enamored with money – who has it, who doesn’t and where it goes and how it gets there. It’s wonderful. Oh, plus one time, I found $5 right on the s…

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25 of the Most Bizarre Looking Currencies in the World

100 trillion dollars

There was a time when all money around the world was nothing but efficient and awesome coins. Then some artsy jokers came and ruined it with fancy paper and 3D shapes and vials of embedded water and sketches of squirrels and all manner of crap. T…

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Quick! Buy Now! Buy Diamond-Encrusted, Gold-Plated Contact Lenses So Your Eyes Can Piss Money!

Diamond Contacts

Hey, there, John Q. Public and Sally H. Regularperson! Have you ever spent hours in front of the mirror trying to put together the perfect assemble for your night on the town, but couldn’t find the right element on the periodic table to cram in to…

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Introducing Holy Taco Premium Plus!

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Console video games have recently begun to employ the usage of a terrible, slimy, money-grabbing tactic known as DLC. DLC stands for Downloadable Content. You pay 60 bucks for your game, and then you have to pay $10 or more for new missions or a ne…

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25 Awesome Pieces of Money Art

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You gotta spend money to make money. You also have to spend money to make art out of money. You know, for supplies and stuff. Paste and whatnot.

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A Vagina Like a Clown Car

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In clown parlance, cramming a bunch of stuff in to a small space is commonly referred to as a Clown Car. In Dungeons and Dragons vernacular the Bag of Holding is probably the best analog. In the world of heroin dealing, it’s called a Karin’s Poon. …

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A Crazy Lady In Spain Thinks She Owns The Sun

A Crazy Lady In Spain Thinks She Owns The Sun

    The Kids in the Hall once had a sketch that ended with Dave Foley looking up to the moon as he wondered, “Gee, I wonder who owns that moon?” If Dennis Hope is to be believed, he is the owner of the moon, and he’l…

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I Really Want To Find A Suitcase Full Of Money

I Really Want To Find A Suitcase Full Of Money

  As we grow up we are indoctrinated with the idea that we need a life plan, two life plans, in fact.  One major career goal and one backup in-case the first one doesn’t work out. I went thought many major career goals as I grew:&nb…

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