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Get Off My Lawn: American Traditions That Used to Be Great and Now Suck

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I’m only in my early 30s, but that’s old enough to recognize how much better some things were in the previous generation.

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Reviewing Movies We Haven’t Seen Yet: May 17th

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Last week was all about Iron Man again because of course it was, all it had as competition was The Great Gatsby. This week a new brand of nerdism rears its ugly head and storms into theaters. Will any other movie have a chance? Ha ha ha, of cours…

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen Yet: May 10th

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Last week, predictable, Iron Man 3 made all the money ever. According to Box Office Mojo it now holds the #2 spot for the greatest gap in box office take between the top grossing film and the second top grossing film in the same week. Iron Man 3 w…

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5 Things I Never Want To See a Ghost Do Again

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I’ve mentioned my distaste for ghosts in horror movies before bit I feel like the message really needs to be clarified. I just found out Paranormal Activity 5 comes out this year and, frankly, I’m absolutely disgusted. God, those are bad movies. …

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen Yet: May 3rd

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What a joke of an article this is going to be, in stark contrast to the usual seriousness of a series that solely exists for me to judge movies I have never and in most cases will never watch. That said, this week is especially delightful because c…

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What To Do With a GoPro Camera

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Some years ago I was given a GoPro camera and I promptly forgot I owned it and put it away somewhere only to just recently find it again. It’s a GoPro Hero HD 960 camera and its main purpose seems to be to take video from your POV while you dive in…

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Reviewing Movies We Haven’t Seen Yet: April 26th

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A few years ago, couldn’t say when exactly, May really became the month when studios started ushering out the big blockbusters. Summer has always been the season of huge film releases but the date of the year’s first big tentpole seems to always fa…

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen: April 19th

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We’ve all had a week to recover from none of us seeing Scary Movie 5, so that’s good. In what was a surprise to no one, that movie sucked and is making shit money. I don’t understand how people keep throwing money at shitty ideas like that. I wil…

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen Yet: April 5th

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Last week I watched John Dies at the End, which you can now see on DVD or Blu Ray. I have nothing much else to say about movies in theaters. I’m sure they were all wonderful and thought provoking and interesting and not shitty. Did GI Joe open? …

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen Yet: March 29th

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The Croods owned the box office last week because a big cartoon tentpole is always sure money. People go see animated releases now because Pixar is all artsy fartsy and you’re almost considered somehow now a film fan if you don’t sit through someth…

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen Yet: March 22nd

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I honestly never remember what I wrote about the week before without looking and this week I refused to check. I think last week Oz won again even though it opened the week before. Oh, Burt Wonderstone opened last week. Yeah, no one saw that. On…

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Reviewing Movies we Haven’t Seen Yet: March 15th

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Last week audiences were whisked away to Oz and from the looks of things this week we’re about to be whisked away to a placed no one gives a shit about. Yeah, it’s another slow looking week of shrugs and turds but there may be one or two gems in th…

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