Explore Holy Taco

Out With the Weird, In With the Angry: Why It’s Time For a Gritty Reboot of Al Yankovic

edit

Weird Al’s shtick is more formulaic and predictable than a Taco Bell cookbook. He’s that wacky uncle who won’t quit cracking jokes, even when everybody else is focused on politics, war, the crumbling economy, and death, like normal…

Read Full Article

Magic’s “Rude” is the Entitled Douchebag Anthem Robin Thicke Forgot to Write

magic

On the surface, Magic’s “Rude” is about guy who wants to marry a girl. At its heart though, lies pure selfishness. The guys asks his girlfriend’s father for permission to marry his daughter. Dad says hell no, but because that…

Read Full Article

Sexy Female Drummers Playing Metal Covers: A Video Tribute

lux-drummerette-viking

There’s something strangely attractive about a woman dominating the drums. Maybe it’s the unbridled passion — the sheer, ecstatic fury of their performances. Maybe I just like girls with calluses on their hands.

Read Full Article

Otto V, World’s Worst Rapper: Why Isn’t He Viral Yet?

otto-v-header

Otto V can’t rap, has nothing to say, but insists he’s the greatest and most revolutionary figure in hip-hop history. Is he deluded, or simply embarking on a failed quest to go viral? The only way to find out for sure is to make him go v…

Read Full Article

Limp Bizkit’s Latest Comeback is Their Stupidest Idea Yet

bizkit

Limp Bizkit is releasing their new single on cassette only, and you have to attend one of their shows to buy it. Outdated media, and an even more outdated band, what a lovely combo. We usually don’t condone giving up, but in Limp’s case,…

Read Full Article

Great Failures from the Past: The Bud Bundy Rap Album

grandmaster-b

The guy who portrayed Bud Bundy, David Faustino, was huge into rap, despite being tiny and white. He even released an album, because nobody told him Grandmaster B was a joke. His single “I Told Ya” is still on YouTube, because Satan̵…

Read Full Article

4 Reasons the Pizza Underground Band Doesn’t Suck

pizza-thumb

Macaulay Culkin’s new band, the Pizza Underground, has been met with much resistance from Velvet Underground fans, pissed off that the band takes VU songs and transforms them into pizza odes. Here’s why the band isn’t nearly as stu…

Read Full Article

“Thank You USA”: Our New National Anthem

clinton-banner

“Thank You USA” is an adorably sincere love song written by Armend Miftari, a terrible Kosovan musician. He wishes to thank America for aiding his country back in the Clinton years, and does so in the cheesiest, most unintentionally hila…

Read Full Article

Katy Perry is the New Champion of Atrocious Lyric Changes

katy-perry-daisy

Katy Perry covered the classic 1892 love song “Daisy Bell,” and actually changed the lyrics. This wasn’t due to artistic inspiration or anything — she simply decided not to sing about being poor, because that’s sad and …

Read Full Article

Prince Returns to Warner Brothers, Already Hates Them Again

prince-slave

Prince recently returned to his old record label, Warner Brothers, after 20+ years of hating them. Less than two weeks in, he already hates them again. It’s the least surprising thing Prince has ever done.

Read Full Article

Reviewing 51 Seconds of the Million-Dollar Wu-Tang Clan Album

Wu-Tang-Clan-Once-Upon-A-Time-In-Shaolin

The Wu-Tang Clan is pressing exactly one copy of their new album. It costs $5 million, and everyone else can only listen to it in a museum of Wu’s choice. Based on the 51-second snippet Forbes just released, the album isn’t even close to…

Read Full Article