Olympics – Holytaco

The Inner Monologue of a Canadian Olympic Basketball Player During the Opening Ceremonies

Oh God. Just…ungh. How did we let this happen? I knew I should have called in sick. Or just smoked some weed or something, they would have disqualified me. What the hell am I doing here?

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The Morning Jolt: The ‘Lympics!

posted 04/13/2012
by Ian Fortey

Get your spandex body suits on, Kids. The Lympics are coming.

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That’s One Way to Carry a Baton

posted 06/01/2010
by

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Dang. I Thought Speed Skating Was the One Event That Wasn’t Gay

posted 03/01/2010
by

Dang-I-Thought-Speed-Skating-Was-One-Event-Wasnt-Gay

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Current Event Haiku

posted 02/23/2010
by

There’s a lot going on in the world right now, and it’s really stressing us out. One of the ways we like to relax is by creating soothing haiku to settle our minds. That’s why we’ve created these current events ha…

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How To: Win an Olympic Gold Medal in 2010

posted 02/19/2010
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You’d think that, with all the prestige surrounding the Winter Olympics, winning a gold medal would be super hard, but from what we’ve seen of the Winter Olympics so far, winning the top prize is actually pretty easy. Here’s …

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Shawn of the Corn

posted 02/17/2010
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The Human Toss

posted 02/16/2010
by

We need the human toss in the Olympics, immediately. Curling starts today in Vancouver and that’s about as exciting as watching a tooth brushing competition. How do we make this happen? If curling can make it in, the human toss has a l…

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PedOlympics

posted 02/04/2010
by

If-You-See-Creepy-Van-2010-Olympics-Get-Inside-It

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P. Diddy Boasts Of Erections. World Sickened

posted 08/12/2008
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I’ve done exactly one red carpet event, and that was so I could go to the Playboy Mansion. I’ll never do another because it’s pretty much the dumbest experience possible. You basically have to sit there and shout compliments to …

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Spanish Olympic Basketball Team Possibly Racist

posted 08/11/2008
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It’s not often in this day and age of political correctness to see a large group of people being totally racist. Unless you live in Spain. According to the Guardian: Spain’s Olympic basketball teams have risked upsetting their Chinese h…

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The Inner Monologue of a Canadian Olympic Basketball Player During the Opening Ceremonies

The Morning Jolt: The ‘Lympics!

That’s One Way to Carry a Baton

Dang. I Thought Speed Skating Was the One Event That Wasn’t Gay

Current Event Haiku

How To: Win an Olympic Gold Medal in 2010

Shawn of the Corn

The Human Toss

PedOlympics

P. Diddy Boasts Of Erections. World Sickened

Spanish Olympic Basketball Team Possibly Racist

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