prison – Holytaco

5 Head Shakingly Sad Reasons for Going to Jail

Take it from our intern, going to jail is no fun. From delousing to cavity searches to bunking with that guy who always smelled like coleslaw, it’s a bad world not mde for the gentle sensibilities of Holy Taco readers. But before you jaunt off to…

Read Full Article

5 Ways to Improve California Prisons

posted 05/25/2011
by Ian Fortey

The Supreme Court has ruled that California needs to find a way to do something with about 40,000 prisoners who don’t really fit into California prisons. Ideas so far have included shipping them out of state, using private prisons (who the hell ow…

Read Full Article

Lindsay Lohan’s (Latest) Day in Prison

posted 04/25/2011
by Ian Fortey

Lindsay Lohan found herself incarcerated again, which obviously isn’t a surprise as she’s in prison about as often as there are screams in Gary Busey’s head. Even though celebs never seem to spend much time behind bars in a singl…

Read Full Article

Drugs in your Butt? Old School. Drugs in Coloring Book? New Hotness

posted 03/31/2011
by Luis Prada

The key to being a good drug mule is innovation. Sure, you may like that new Lady Gaga single a bunch, but if you hear it 1,000 times it’s going to get stale and predictable. The same applies to shoving drugs in your pooper. Eventually, the cops w…

Read Full Article

A Day In The Life of Prisoner #224584 (aka Lindsay Lohan)

posted 07/12/2010
by

If you’re like us, then you, too, are probably wondering why Lindsay Lohan is going to jail. Not because we feel she should be cleared of all charges and be set free, for The Lohan can do no wrong. No; it’s because we, like you, literal…

Read Full Article

Michael Vick’s Prison Haiku

posted 07/28/2009
by

People take up strange hobbies in prison, just to pass the time. Some people get tattoos. Some people benchpress things. Michael Vick spent his prison time writing haiku, and we managed to snag a page out of his haiku journal to pr…

Read Full Article

Bernie Madoff’s Prison Twitter Page

posted 03/16/2009
by

As you probably know, Ponzi schemer and all-around terrible person Bernie Madoff was sent to prison last week until his trial. But with all his free time, Bernie has started a twitter page. Here it is: (Note: To make it easier to read, we reversed t…

Read Full Article

The Last Line Of This Story Makes Me Sad

posted 11/18/2008
by

Read Full Article

Gary Glitter Gets ‘Nam Prison Makeover

posted 08/19/2008
by

All of my knowledge of prison comes from either TV or movies (Oz, Shawshank Redemption, Gaytanamo) but I assume that all the ass-rammings, ass-beatings, ass-blitzings and ass-assings would leave a man a little worse for wear. Especially guys that g…

Read Full Article

5 Head Shakingly Sad Reasons for Going to Jail

5 Ways to Improve California Prisons

Lindsay Lohan’s (Latest) Day in Prison

Drugs in your Butt? Old School. Drugs in Coloring Book? New Hotness

A Day In The Life of Prisoner #224584 (aka Lindsay Lohan)

Michael Vick’s Prison Haiku

Bernie Madoff’s Prison Twitter Page

The Last Line Of This Story Makes Me Sad

Gary Glitter Gets ‘Nam Prison Makeover

Photo of the Day

Best of Taco