Scientists Love A Nice, Gigantic Ass

Finally, some science I can get behind. According to Reuters.com:

CHICAGO (Reuters) - A type of fat that accumulates around the hips and bottom may actually offer some protection against diabetes, U.S. researchers said on Tuesday.

Kahn said he started the study to find out why fat located in different parts of the body seems to have different risks of metabolic disease such as diabetes.

Mice that got subcutaneous fat transplanted into their bellies started to slim down after several weeks.

“If we can capture those (substances), we might have an opportunity to convert them into drugs or use them as guides to help develop drugs,” he said.

Wow. I have seen the future and it is full of commercials for pharmaceuticals that will give the world slim waistlines and great big phat asses. It’s like we’ll all be living in one big hip-hop video…or Kim Kardashian’s sex tape. I can not wait. I wonder what they’re going to call these new drugs? Assiphlax? Derrivere? Viassgra? Whatever it’s going to be called, I think I finally have something to look forward to (besides Judge Judy reruns). Thank you, science.

via jezebel.com

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Scientists Make Amazing Discovery!

According to ananova.com

Scientists believe they have discovered the secret of tiny Kylie Minogue’s perfect legs.

Research found the average 5ft 4in woman would need shapely 30.5 inch long legs to reach perfection.

“Although her legs are petite, they are proportionally long compared with her small frame,” reports New Scientist.

Every time I read shit about scientists, it’s never anything like what my science class was like at all.  If I knew being a scientist was just a big ass party where you sit around with your buddies and go “I wonder why I like boobs?  Let’s get a few million dollars of federal money and a lab and find out,” I wouldn’t be here writing a blog.  Instead, I have NO IDEA why I like boobs and have to sit here all day and wonder about the different possible reasons.

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