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For the Ladies: Seven Reasons You Should Consider Anal Sex

Begging for forgiveness

Try it, you’ll love it. No seriously. Trust me.

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25 Things We Could Do in an Elevator Together

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It’s you and me on our way up to the 13th floor and the elevator craps out. We’re trapped. Is help coming? Maybe. Maybe we’ll die here together. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. What exactly can you do with me on an ele…

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25 Sex Toy Names We Really Need

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Fleshlight is a finely named product, as are Rub My Duckies and Butt plugs, because they are plugs for your butt and that seems an accurate moniker. But if you have to name sex toys, you may as well have some fun with it.

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The Definitive List of Masturbation Euphemisms

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They say 95% of people admit to masturbating and the other 5% are liars. Ha ha, burn! Wankers. And it’s true that every so often you smack the walrus the right way and it feels alright so you keep doing t. It’s human nature.

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Underused Sexting Abbreviations

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Sexting is such a way of life now that politicians legitimately think they can do it and then run for office without being held accountable for it. Silly politicians. For the rest of us it’s just the natural evolution of phone sex, itself the natur…

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The Classiest Euphemisms for Sex

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Sex is a pretty integral part of life and very few of us would exist if not for a little ram jam in a Wal Mart change room. But referring to it simply as “sex” gets old pretty fast, which is why a creative few of us have come up with some snazzy eu…

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25 Pick Up Lines That Never Fail (Probably)

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As you’ve no doubt noticed, I am smooth as shit. It’s a skill. A skill I will now share with you by letting you enjoy some of my more awesome pick up lines. No need to thank me.

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Escort Ads From Washed Up Celebrities

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I have to be honest, I have no idea how I’ve been running this site for so long without not only doing these but making this a regular feature. Oh well. Enjoy!

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Ranking Everyday Tasks in Order of Difficulty When You’re Dead Tired

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Do you sleep much? I don’t. I want to. My idea of a good day involves sleeping till noon. I could sleep for a solid 14 hours if left to my own devices, but alas I have work and life and responsibilities and a social stigma that says you’re a bi…

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5 Things Everything Must Like to Be Normal

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In the 50s, if TV hasn’t lead me astray, everyone knew what normal was. Everyone wanted to be normal and abnormal was uncool. Then sometime in the 90s people started saying “what’s normal anyway?” and we decided to accept all kinds of insanity all…

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The Oldest Dildo in the World: A Perspective

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It’s 28,000 years ago. Saber-toothed cats still exist. As do Neanderthals. Humanity is slowly establishing itself, art is being created, and tools. And in a cave, in what is present day Germany, someone stores their stone dildo. It’s about 8 in…

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