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Kids Aren’t Hilariously Inappropriate. Crappy Photoshoppers Are.

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Kids being accidentally inappropriate is a curiously viral thing. These little tykes are so gosh-darn innocent, and so ludicrously bad at spelling, whenever they try to write something cute, it comes out evil, sexual, or sexually evil. Problem: ever…

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The Six Hottest Teachers Who Got Arrested for Having Sex With Their Students

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Aw yeah. The crazy ones always give the best homework.

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Here’s That Photo of Julia Louis-Dreyfus Banging a Clown That Everybody’s Talking About

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Carry on, Julia. Your clown-sex photos are romantic and tasteful.

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For the Ladies: Seven Reasons You Should Consider Anal Sex

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Try it, you’ll love it. No seriously. Trust me.

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25 Things We Could Do in an Elevator Together

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It’s you and me on our way up to the 13th floor and the elevator craps out. We’re trapped. Is help coming? Maybe. Maybe we’ll die here together. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. What exactly can you do with me on an ele…

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25 Sex Toy Names We Really Need

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Fleshlight is a finely named product, as are Rub My Duckies and Butt plugs, because they are plugs for your butt and that seems an accurate moniker. But if you have to name sex toys, you may as well have some fun with it.

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The Definitive List of Masturbation Euphemisms

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They say 95% of people admit to masturbating and the other 5% are liars. Ha ha, burn! Wankers. And it’s true that every so often you smack the walrus the right way and it feels alright so you keep doing t. It’s human nature.

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Underused Sexting Abbreviations

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Sexting is such a way of life now that politicians legitimately think they can do it and then run for office without being held accountable for it. Silly politicians. For the rest of us it’s just the natural evolution of phone sex, itself the natur…

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The Classiest Euphemisms for Sex

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Sex is a pretty integral part of life and very few of us would exist if not for a little ram jam in a Wal Mart change room. But referring to it simply as “sex” gets old pretty fast, which is why a creative few of us have come up with some snazzy eu…

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25 Pick Up Lines That Never Fail (Probably)

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As you’ve no doubt noticed, I am smooth as shit. It’s a skill. A skill I will now share with you by letting you enjoy some of my more awesome pick up lines. No need to thank me.

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Escort Ads From Washed Up Celebrities

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I have to be honest, I have no idea how I’ve been running this site for so long without not only doing these but making this a regular feature. Oh well. Enjoy!

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