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The 5 Best Undergarments for Burning

woman's rights rally

Holy Taco has long been a bastion of support and hope for womyn the world over. The fierce regime of man is toppling and before long the Gynocracy will rule and the Dicktatorship will fall limp and flaccid like the withered and worn scuzzle stick dangling uselessly between the liver-spotted legs of Larry King.

In order to symbolically free ourselves of the oppression of men, we must destroy the tool by which we allow ourselves to be oppressed. No, not Grey’s Anatomy DVDs, the breasticular bindings and labial prisons men have long thrust upon the sources of our womynly prowess and power. Let us destroy them with fire!

old lady lingerie

It’s not tea time in this horrendously tyrannical piece meant to keep womyn confined in the kitchen. Notice the stockings and heels, both designed by phallocrats to keep the legs of womyn permanently at the ready to bow to the scrotalocracy! Never again!

This intelligent, young suffragette is forced to grasp her own head in exasperation as her proud she-nugs are plastered beneath so much satin-coated man-hate. Due to poor manufacturing standards this cleavage criminal will burn quite readily.

stockings and lace and such

No powerful, independent and vaginally secure womyn needs so much lace or gloves that are so long unless she’s choosing to express herself in some manner of vocation requiring full arm insertions such as artificially impregnating equine.

Fraulein has the right idea as she plucks away the uncomfortable strap of subjugation and begins to pry the angular cones of areola imprisonment from her proud and confident body to be hurled into the purging fires of uterine triumph!

form fit bra

This is Formfit alright, if the form is the mold cast by male chauvinism and intolerance! Rage against the Vaginus Fly Trap and burst free from your cottony confines you proud mons venus, explore the wonders of Mother Nature and tear down the supportive and hip-squashing walls of domination!

big panties

Ah, what have we here? Rich, breathable cotton, secure and comforting elastics and a pragmatic, padded gusset ensure that this is no man’s foolhardy undergarment of subjugation, this is a real womyn’s treat; a comfortable and self-assured garment designed by and for womyn who have strength of character and of the pubic region. Hold them high, sisters! Bravely wave your parge, off-white panties for all the world to see as the fires of Victoria and her man secret burn to the ground!

2 Responses to "The 5 Best Undergarments for Burning"

  1. DonkeyXote says:

    uhm NO!