Here at HolyTaco, we're big sports fans. And we're also big fans of eating piles of snack foods while we watch said sports. So, in honor of the Super Bowl and our need to cram our faces full of processed foods with funny names, we created this football stadium made entirely out of snack foods.
Ingredients:
The Field:
1 Pound of Guacamole
15 Oz. Queso Dip For The Steelers End Zone
15 Oz. Salsa For The Cardinals End Zone
2 Oz. Sour Cream for the Field Lines
The Players:
15 Vienna Sausages
Helmets - 3 Oz. Sharp Cheddar Cheese
The Goal Posts:
1 Slim Jim for Each Goal Post
1 Oz. Monterey Jack Cheddar To Anchor (each)
The Stands:
58 Twinkies
1 Pound of Bacon
1 Bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos
1 Bag of Cheetos
1 Bag of Corn Tortilla Chips
1 Bag of Chex Mix
The Blimp:
20 Oz. Football-Shaped Summer Sausage (optional) (on second thought, no, this isn't optional. Go buy one.)
TOTAL CALORIES: 24,375
TOTAL GRAMS OF FAT: 1,285
TOTAL COST: $86.47
TOTAL DELICIOUSNESS: 1 Billion trillion, dude. One billion trillion.
The Process:
STEP 1 - Ingredients:
Put all your ingredients on an empty table and take a really crappy photo of them.
STEP 2- The Field:
Take one pound of guacamole and smear it on the center of a baking tray, leaving a section on either end for the end zones.
STEP 3 - The End Zones
It's important here to fill one end zone with one filling, and one end zone with another, so that neither team receives home field deliciousness. We chose salsa for the Cardinals, and Queso dip for the Steelers.
STEP 4 - Yard Lines
Take sour cream and put it into a turkey baster, then squeeze gently to make the yard lines across the field.
STEP 5 - The Players and goal posts
Vienna sausages make delicious players, and tiny cheese wedge helmets help keep them from getting concussions. Two different types of cheese helps to distinguish the teams. The goal posts are made from Slim Jim's, that we cut up, then stuck together with tooth picks. Monterey Jack cheese was used as an anchor to keep them standing, with a tooth pick linking the two together. At no point was it necessary to "snap in to" any of these slim jims. Cutting worked better.
FIELD REVIEW
Now that the field is finished, you can begin constructing the stadium around it, which you will also eat. It's important to lay down some paper towels, so that no food comes in contact with your disgusting table top. (Because if you're a person who makes this, you definitely have a disgusting table top.)
STEP 6 - The Stadium
The twinkie is nature's brick. You can make your stadium as large as you want, depending on how many twinkies you have at your disposal. We had 58. And probably could have used 90. Use tooth picks to secure the twinkies to one another. This outer stadium wall will provide a delicious dessert when the contents of the stadium have been eaten.
STEP 7 - The Bacon Wall
The bacon wall is the most important part of the stadium, because it keeps the throngs of screaming fans, in this case chips, from falling on the field, in this case the guacamole and salsa. Insert tooth picks into the first row of twinkies, and then weave the bacon in and out of them, so that it forms a pliable wall.
STEP 8: The Fans/Chips
Without the fans, there would be no game. It's no different in your snack stadium, so select four different kinds of snacks to fill the stands. Be sure to use pieces of bacon to separate your crowd into sections, as you can see in the corners of the stadium in this photo.
STEP 9 - The Frenzy
As you can see, the chips give the feeling of a crowd of crazed fans. Especially the cheetos, who can barely contain their excitement at Vienna Sausage Roethlisberger and his delectable team.
STEP 10 - The Sausage Blimp
At any major sporting event, a blimp shows up. In this case it's a 20 ounce summer sausage, that's shaped like a football. It doesn't float, we just took out the wire in photoshop, so don't get freaked out.
Ummm Ok so I like the idea of the field made out of the salsa, nacho cheese, and guacamole...but the rest of it is gross! LOL....someone hold my hair while I vomit!!.
CONGRATS TO THE STEELERS ON WINNING THE "PENALTY BOWL" ..... IF ONLY THE REFS DIDNT HAVE SUCH A LARGE HAND IN THIS , ONE OF THE GREATEST SUPERBOWLS EVER PLAYED .
I am gasping for breath - this is an awe-inspiring work of staggering genius and I salute you, our American sisters and brothers. may your girth never lessen.
(pity about the game, but)
I made this for the game and immediately received the "Best Girlfriend Award" from my boyfriend and his friends. Although we used lil' smokies instead of vienna sausages, got Fritos instead of cheetos and used mini corn dogs instead of twinkies. The ketchup and mustard also made for nice Cardinal and Steeler colors.
Pretty F-n cool!
Check out www.love2wager.com and see how you can get a lifetime of FREE picks for the MLB and NBA seasons. That's right, FREE! Just go today and check out last season's MLB record which was a perfect 43-0, and the current NBA season which is a perfect 62-0. Go today and take the gamble out of gambling.
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Good morning. Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future.
I am from Slovakia and too bad know English, give true I wrote the following sentence: "Search engine optimization services to improve your web site ranking.It is time to stop relying on half baked advice and hot tips that look good for the moment, but eventually leave you in the same old slump."
Give please. The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it.
I am from Bahrain and learning to speak English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Consumers purchase million bottles of over the counter anti allergic the notable anti allergic effect of placebos and tear substitutes in clinical."
When you drop the deuce resulting from the consumption of this, call the Chicago Bears, because they'll sign your heap of shit to a long-term deal worth millions.
club penguin
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(244 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
February 1st, 2009 at 02:39 pm
I'm so jealous, I mean come on 58 twinkies, right there you had me!
February 1st, 2009 at 03:06 pm
I've got just two words,"Deeeee Licious" LOLOL, GO ZONA
February 1st, 2009 at 03:42 pm
How absolutely unabatedly disgusting.
February 1st, 2009 at 04:13 pm
Ummm Ok so I like the idea of the field made out of the salsa, nacho cheese, and guacamole...but the rest of it is gross! LOL....someone hold my hair while I vomit!!.
February 1st, 2009 at 04:21 pm
omg you touched the twinkies with bacon!
February 1st, 2009 at 04:42 pm
Mmmmmm....Twinkies and bacon! Im perplexed about the Twinkies. At first glance I thought they were hot dog rolls! LOL
February 2nd, 2009 at 12:55 am
JIZZ IN MY PANTS
February 2nd, 2009 at 09:02 am
I made it and I used corn dogs instead of twinkies and I also didn't really need the bacon for the fence, toothpicks worked fine for me.
The whole thing only cost me 40$ I'm not sure how you came up with 86?
February 2nd, 2009 at 09:14 am
CONGRATS TO THE STEELERS ON WINNING THE "PENALTY BOWL" ..... IF ONLY THE REFS DIDNT HAVE SUCH A LARGE HAND IN THIS , ONE OF THE GREATEST SUPERBOWLS EVER PLAYED .
February 2nd, 2009 at 10:40 am
When do we get to see the "after" picture, both of the littered remains AND the people who actually ate it?!?
February 2nd, 2009 at 01:35 pm
That is AWESOME.
February 2nd, 2009 at 01:59 pm
WT chow
February 3rd, 2009 at 02:12 am
I am gasping for breath - this is an awe-inspiring work of staggering genius and I salute you, our American sisters and brothers. may your girth never lessen.
(pity about the game, but)
February 5th, 2009 at 04:19 pm
Thank you...I have not laughed this hard in a long time!
February 7th, 2009 at 08:38 am
that is the future! anybody that wrote something bad, is just a hateing looser!SHAME ON YOU!
February 10th, 2009 at 08:26 am
change the twinkies for cheese sticks and you'll have the god of all salty snacks.
February 10th, 2009 at 02:02 pm
I made this for the game and immediately received the "Best Girlfriend Award" from my boyfriend and his friends. Although we used lil' smokies instead of vienna sausages, got Fritos instead of cheetos and used mini corn dogs instead of twinkies. The ketchup and mustard also made for nice Cardinal and Steeler colors.
February 10th, 2009 at 06:10 pm
wow...very creative >^_^<
February 11th, 2009 at 07:08 am
Gold! Would love to use a high res image of this in the magazine i work for as a Superbowl illustration... can we get a high res image please?
February 11th, 2009 at 10:32 pm
You MUST submit this to thisiswhyyourefat.com. Must. It's genius.
February 12th, 2009 at 07:38 pm
Thats because there are no 7-11s or supermarkets in Iraq/Afghanistan
February 16th, 2009 at 02:49 pm
OMG...That's really cool but so very nasty. Some of those foods should not be on the same plate :P
February 24th, 2009 at 08:49 am
Pretty F-n cool!
Check out www.love2wager.com and see how you can get a lifetime of FREE picks for the MLB and NBA seasons. That's right, FREE! Just go today and check out last season's MLB record which was a perfect 43-0, and the current NBA season which is a perfect 62-0. Go today and take the gamble out of gambling.
March 2nd, 2009 at 08:42 am
that was realy fucking awsome
March 7th, 2009 at 07:34 am
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March 9th, 2009 at 06:21 am
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March 30th, 2009 at 10:20 pm
wow that's very cool! i wish i could do something like it in the future!
May 11th, 2009 at 01:50 pm
i made one it was awesome!!!
May 12th, 2009 at 10:31 am
Good morning. Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future.
I am from Slovakia and too bad know English, give true I wrote the following sentence: "Search engine optimization services to improve your web site ranking.It is time to stop relying on half baked advice and hot tips that look good for the moment, but eventually leave you in the same old slump."
Waiting for a reply :-(, Grette.
May 26th, 2009 at 10:35 pm
yeah its. really good
Physical Condition
May 29th, 2009 at 02:10 am
Great Post
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May 29th, 2009 at 02:12 am
Great Content
architecture degree
May 29th, 2009 at 02:12 am
Its Great.
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May 29th, 2009 at 02:13 am
thanks for sharing.
design bachelor degree
June 6th, 2009 at 10:24 am
I like the recipe. Just for my son :)
Mike from digital pianos blog.
June 22nd, 2009 at 10:10 am
OMG...That's really cool but so very nasty. Some of those foods should not be on the same plate
how use a floor jack on a car
June 7th, 2009 at 09:52 am
Give please. The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it.
I am from Bahrain and learning to speak English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Consumers purchase million bottles of over the counter anti allergic the notable anti allergic effect of placebos and tear substitutes in clinical."
Regards 8) Brighton.
June 9th, 2009 at 09:23 pm
Hi! CvvqXi
June 10th, 2009 at 05:24 pm
Hi! ZJVuQGU
June 16th, 2009 at 02:31 am
When you drop the deuce resulting from the consumption of this, call the Chicago Bears, because they'll sign your heap of shit to a long-term deal worth millions.
club penguin
July 2nd, 2009 at 01:07 am
Wow its incredible..thats truly a yummy stadium..
I can eat the whole stadium in 15 minutes ;)
Sample Resume
July 14th, 2009 at 04:23 am
that's really great and interesting -
Survey Software
July 30th, 2009 at 10:07 pm
THE GREATEST THING I'V EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!SMD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
November 16th, 2009 at 11:28 am
Thats fucking sweet. And Nic says go suck a twinkie.
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