Valentine’s Day can be a tough holiday for all those lonely, single, unlovable people out there. So, instead of feeling bad about the fact that no one finds them attractive, we thought that single people should celebrate their inability to be in a healthy relationship with a member of the opposite sex (or same sex, we don’t judge here.) Here are some products that will help them get through this difficult time. And as a bonus, all these products are available at
HolyTaco’s CafePress Store.
The "I’m With Nobody" Shirts & Mug
What better way to let everyone know that there is no person in your life that loves you, than with a wacky t-shirt!
The "This is How I Roll" Shirt for Lone Sleepers
So you don’t get laid, so what? Maybe you don’t get laid ON PURPOSE! For some logical non-religious reason..that I can’t think of right now.
Purchase them here, four colors available for only 17.99! Mens and womens shirts both available.
The "I Feed on the Tears of the Lonely" Teddy Bear
This teddy bear can only live off your lonely, lonely, tears. So let your friends know that you know they’re all alone in life, by purchasing Mr. Lonely-lufagus!
The "I Already Roofied Myself" Beer Mug
Nobody would EVER roofie someone that had already been roofied! I mean, that’d just be a waste of a roofie, right?! Keep yourself safe this Valentine’s day, with this Beer Stein that let’s people know, you’re going to be immovable long before they can get a chance to force sex upon you.
The "If You’re Reading This, Then You’re Me" Underwear
What better way to remind yourself that absolutely no one will ever have sex with you, than to write it on your underwear? Maybe a parrot that repeats "no one will ever have sex with you." But you couldn’t get that parrot for the low low price of
15.99 for guys and 10.99 for women, right?
Courtney Love & Muppet Sexual Assault
Playboy’s Big Dance March Madness Bracket Challenge
I love the underwear!
im just glad im not a sprem toilette.
I have no problem being alone when I want, it’s the haveing sex when I want that’s a problem.
everyone here is a guy
I mean where do you get things lol
dang I got a tatoo like that ;p
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
We are just glad no one is having sex with you
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Being in a relationship is great, unless your gf is a skanky biatch who wont eat at Chilies. Me n my gf’s relationship is moreover like Ill get in the carm she’ll ask, where you wanna eat… Im going to feed you babeUGG Gissella
Being in a relationship is great, unless your gf is a skanky biatch who wont eat at Chilies. Me n my gf’s relationship is moreover like Ill get in the carm she’ll ask, where you wanna eat… Im going to feed you babe.
ha ha ha! these comments are better than the page itself!! and yes ducks rule. QUACK.
hahah I think I’m gonna get a shirt printed with that for this weekend and wear it when I go out to the bar!
i forgot “Into My Hand” which is quite crucial
hahaha i love a good ducking. which reminds me. can you guys make one for me that says “I’m Going to be Balls Deep Tonight”?
“Waa waa, I’m single, boo hoo!” Shut the fuck up and get a girlfriend and then you’ll really know misery.
not funny.
M8, u r such a tw@ why the f would u say tht. 1 Day I HOPE it’s you, then I shall laugh at you 2!!!!!!!!
What do ducks have to do with relationships? Sick dude.
Whoever wrote can go fuck themselves. You think being single is fucking funny, a big ducking joke? Go to hell you fucking prick!
that’s funny
It really was though..
Girlfriends r a pain in the ass, BEING SINGLE IS THE ONLY WAY TO GO!!!!!!
Why have sex with the same girl all the time?
Us single guys have the best of both worlds, wemon when we want, alone when we want, it’s perfection!
speak for yourself.
This list is PERFECTION!!! Can’t stop laughing!
My TWO mom’s would think that pillow was HILARIOUS!!!