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Wait, What Happened? – May 16th, 2011

Osama Bin Laden is a lot like you and I, In that he had a huge porn stash.

I hate to humanize a monster, but I’m sure his post-mortem embarrasment hit him hard when he realized he’d forgotten to tell a friend to hide his porn collection when he died.

Full Article From Reuters

Disney Trademarks "Seal Team 6"

Which means, there is going to be a Disney movie about the elite team of badasses who hunted down and killed Bin Laden. I hope it’s an Alladin Sequel.

Full Article from Media Bistro

Quickest Route From Arizona to Mexico? Take The Tunnel

Oh sure, it’s probably dangerous, and guarded by armed Mexican outlaws, but passport paperwork is a pain in the ass.

Full Article From Reuters

Google Netbooks Coming Soon, Providing a Cheap Convenient Way to Give Google Your Personal Info

The new Chrome laptops will be available to the public soon, and everything they do is web based. So you can keep all your documents and information on Google’s servers. That way, if you lose or damage the laptop, you can ask Google to have your precious data back. I’m sure the TOS on these little Big Brother machines is full of so much fine print, it’d blow your mind. Let’s just go ahead and add a "social security number" box to our facebook profiles now.

Full Article From Wall Street Journal

Donald Trump Is Racist, According To Former Apprentice Contestant… And Everyone Else

Former Trump Apprentice, Kevin Allen, is letting everyone know what has become quite apparent. Trump is as racist as a white trash uncle. He mocked Allen’s educational background and kicked him off the show for being "too smart."

Full Article From Talking Points Memo

Apple Is The World’s Most Valuable Brand

Apple has officially replaced Google as the world’s most valuable brand. Makes sense, but I’m still a Google fan. When Apple develops a search algorithm that can find me topless pictures of Anne Hathaway in less than a second, then I may consider changing allegiance.

Full Article From Time’s Techland

A Canadian Woman Survived In The Wilderness For Seven Weeks On Melted Snow And Candy

Thus proving once again, that my parents were full of shit. It is possible to survive on melted snow and candy.

Full Article From The Globe and Mail

Now A Female Peacock Has Escaped From The Bronx Zoo

Ok, Bronx Zoo. First a cobra, now this? Cages people, cages. Use them, and lock them up at night.

Full Article From NY Daily News

Two Headed Baby Born In China

Because China has to remind us they’re about to take over, by doing everything twice as good as us.

Full Article From The Washington Post


2 Responses to "Wait, What Happened? – May 16th, 2011"

  1. Gazza says:

    Also a woman got her head sliced off in spain by a nut job. In a food store… By a nut job, that they just let out. Nut job.

  2. DonkeyXote says:

    Just how I like my news!!