Great news! We all survived the rapture! I know you were probably too worried about dying to keep up with current events, so I’ve compiled this list of things you should know about. Here is this week’s “Wait, What Happened?”…
Harold Camping feels really stupid.
Harold Camping, the guy who falsely predicted the end of days is probably the most red-faced man in the world right now. Camping was confronted and said “I’m looking for answers, but now I have nothing else to say.” Way to go Nostra-dumbass! (See what I did there? Ha.)
Full Article at San Francisco Chronicle
Cali Swag rapper and certified “Dougie” instructor, M-Bone was killed in a drive by shooting.
On May 16th the angels cried out from the heavens “Teach me how to Dougie!” R.I.P. M-Bone.
Full article at MTV.com
Newt Gingrich got glittered by the most fabulous protester EVER!
At a book signing in Minneapolis, Gingrich and his wife were showered with glitter by political activist, Nick Espinosa. Fierce! I really hope this becomes a the new fad in non-violent protesting.
Check out the video
Arnold Schwarzenegger knocked up his maid.
The Governator had a child with his long-time housekeeper and tried to keep it a secret, until recently. Schwarzenegger attempted to deny his role, but the love-child’s giant forehead and strange Austrian accent were a dead giveaway.
Full article at the L.A. Times
Obama is selling birth certificate merch now.
He’s pushing his “Made in the USA” t-shirts like a cliched traveling comedian selling “Who Farted” beer coozies. Grab one on your way out of the show!
Full article at abcnews.com
Sarah Palin’s son, Track, got married.
Then tried to take his wife’s first name.
Full article at People Magazine
“Botox Mom” admitted that she made the whole thing up for a few hundred bucks.
Which still makes her a bad mom. The woman admitted to making the whole thing up to earn two-hundred dollars from a British tabloid. Nice.
Full article at TMZ
Macho Man Randy Savage died at the wheel May 20th.
“Oooh Yeah! Snap into a utility pole!”… Too soon?
Full article at TMZ
The Morale of U.S. troops in Afghanistan is at an all time low.
That’s hard to believe… Who’d have thought being at war in a hostile, mountainous desert region for ten years would make you feel shitty?
Full article at CBS News