Just before I went to bed last night, I came across a minor news story that seemed like it could develop in to a major news story. Some are claiming that republican presidential hopeful Rick Santorum may have used the N-word while talking about Barack Obama during a campaign speech. Without having read the story or watching the video, I fell asleep thinking it was simply a case of Santorum opponents freaking out over something that never even happened, just to make him look bad. I’m no Santorum fan, but there’s no way he could have used the N-word when talking about a black person. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt.
And then I woke up and watched the video, which you can see below:
As I said, I really want to give Rick the benefit of the doubt here. We have no idea what he was going to say. I really want to believe that someone that has made it this far in the race for the presidency isn’t a full-on racist that is comfortable using the N-word while giving speeches that are being recorded by cameras and microphones. So the question remains: what was he going to say? In that specific context, what would that “Nig—“ word have been? I want to believe Rick wasn’t going to say the dreaded N-word, but then there’s that little part of my brain that, after I watch the clip, says, “yeeeeeaaah, he was totally going to say the N-word.”
Again, I do not want this to be true, even though there’s isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell that I would ever vote for Rick Santorum and I would be happy to see him drop out of the race.
So let’s play devil’s advocate here and try to figure out what Rick Santorum was going to say, if for no other reason than to convince myself that there isn’t an un-shameful racist running for president.
Here’s my transcript of the quote in question:
“We know the candidate Barack Obama, what he was like – the anti-war, government nig— the, uh… America was a source for division around the world.”
Negotiator
Republicans are always getting on Obama’s case for his supposed “appeasement” to our “enemies” because some members of the party don’t understand that peace doesn’t always come out of having superior firepower. In this instance, calling Obama a “negotiator” is the republican equivalent of a curse word. It’s like “fuckhead” or “cock-monger.” Of course, that is a board generalization of the republican point of view, but during elections, regardless of party and political affiliation, broad generalizations are all you hear from candidates because the candidates are performing their Talking Points Greatest Hits to appease people that are going to vote for them anyway. Might as well feed them what they like to hear to keep your poll numbers up.
Nickelback Fan
If Rick Santorum was going to accuse Barack Obama of being a Nickelback fan, but then, at the last second, pulled back, that means Rick made the greatest error of his campaign. He would have won the presidency in a landslide.
Nick Cannon Associate
Let’s trick ourselves in to thinking the “Nig” was actually “Nic” yet again. And let’s trick ourselves in to thinking that Rick Santorum was going to say “Nick Cannon.” This wouldn’t be the biggest shot taken at Barack Obama, but if you follow a weird train of logic, it works.
Nick Cannon = Nick Cannon Has Sex With Mariah Carey = “Really? The Drumline guy?” = Everybody hates Nick Cannon
It’s a massive stretch, but it works.
Screw it. He was going to say the N-Word
Rick, you made it very hard to try to be rational here. I couldn’t agree with your political views any less, yet here I am trying to save your ass, and I’m doing a piss poor job of it because what you gave me to work with is pretty close to damning. I will still give you the benefit of the doubt, but holy shit, you’ve made it hard to brush this off and dismiss it as nothing.
Unless Rick was going to compare Barack Obama to Nigella Lawson, the sexy Food Network chef, that one’s scratched out.
Niggard, and all of its various forms, is a word used to describe stingy people. If “niggard” was the word Rick was going to use, it runs counter to the republican talking point of Obama being the “tax and spend liberal.” So that’s ruled out, too.
After that, we have the N-word, followed by 11 forms of the N-word. This is then followed by a long list of variations on the word “night,” which contains the “nig” in question but doesn’t make the all-important “nig” pronunciation.
The list wraps up with a series of words that are in no way plausible, unless Rick Santorum was going to accuse Barack Obama of “Nigromancy,” which I assume means he was going to accuse Barack Obama of being a witch.
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