You've probably seen the commercials for Funny People, the movie that stars Adam Sandler, Seth Rogen, and a whole bunch of other hilarious people that your girlfriend would leave you for in a heartbeat. We found ourselves wondering how someone goes about becoming a stand-up comedian. To us, becoming a stand-up comedian seems a lot like getting drunk at a party and then boning a fat chick in the closet: it's long, difficult, and humiliating, and people are laughing at you the entire time. Since we don't like any of those things, we decided to force our intern, Noah, to become a stand-up comedian, so that we could see how it works without putting forth any of the effort. You probably remember Noah from the Adult Friend Finder Series:
Our first mission was to tell Noah that we were forcing him to become a stand-up comedian. Noah is naturally a pretty nervous dude, and since he's from Minnesota, he doesn't really take to surprises very well. At first, he seemed a little hesitant:
Obviously, we didn't give up that easily. We complimented the fluffiness of his hair, and his somewhat-groomed beard. We mentioned that, the aforementioned beard makes him look a lot like a shorter, slightly chubbier version of Chuck Norris. We talked about his quasi-hawaiian shirt, and how we really enjoy things that are kind of Hawaiian, but not so Hawaiian that you think, "Oh, that's definitely from Hawaii." It seemed like Noah was starting to warm up to the idea:
After being denied twice by Chubby Chuck Norris, we decided that, in the words of Martin Lawrence: "Shit just got real." Rather than back down, we decided to raise the stakes a little bit. We went and found Noah (sitting at another person's desk, for some reason) and offered him $200 in cash if he would allow us to force him to become a stand-up comedian. $200. Cash. No questions asked. Suddenly, Noah's entire attitude changed:
That's right: instead of just flipping us off like he usually does, Noah was blatantly giving a double-thumbs-down to our generous bribe. It's possible that he realized we had just taken $80 and folded the bills over to make it look like more money than it actually was. Whatever his reasoning, it seemed like Noah's unwillingness to participate had seriously f*cked us over. We figured we'd have to forfeit, and forget about the stand-up experiment altogether. That's when we realized that we had another intern:
This is Spencer, the other Holy Taco intern. Spencer is young, vibrant, and full of optimism. He's also much easier to bribe than Noah, and we got him to sign on to the experiment in exchange for a Holy Taco bumper sticker. Spencer is not a comedian. He's never done stand-up comedy before. He's not quite as awkward as Noah, but we feel confident that, in an intense situation, he's bound to do something ridiculous. He's the right intern for the job, and we're happy he's onboard (and for so cheap!!!).
How the Experiment is Going to Work
Two weeks from tomorrow, Spencer is going to perform at an open-mic night. He'll do a 5-minute stand-up set, and we'll film the entire thing. Sure, it's a small step, but it's the first step toward a stand-up career, and it's often the hardest step to take, so watching Spencer trip on that step will be fantastic. We'll check in with him periodically to see what he's been watching and reading, and what kind jokes he's been working on, and we're even working on bringing in a special guest for Spencer to interview, in order to get some helpful tips and advice. Stay tuned for Part 2 later this week, because it's going to be a ridiculous ride.
In the meantime, suggested that Spencer work a good celebrity impersonation into his open mic routine, and we suggested this Don Friesen clip as inspiration:
How are you to sit there and compare Gaffigan and Boyle? That's so retarded that if this was Family Guy, I'd be saying "This is retarded" and cut to a clip of you holding a reb balloon.
Ha. I'm a stand-up comedian, and your description of what it's like is pretty dead on. Where's this performance going down? I actually host an open mic in LA and would love to host a performance from Spencer.
lol. Would you like to make friends with people from other country or place?
Log on __ ^-^ BlackWhiteConnect.com ^-^ ___
Then you can get help and suggestions from all over the world.
While you may find your true love or friendship there.
I remember my first night doing stand-up - had 100 people from work in the crowd. Alcohol is a bad idea b4 going on stage. Oh it helps you relax...well let me tell you 4 beers and six shots is a bit beyond relaxed.
does Noah have a fan site already? cuz he needs one
hes not getting enough exposure
I asked for the Noah at my barbershop and dude didn't even know who I was talking about
(16 Comments)
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July 13th, 2009 at 03:18 pm
Jim Gaffigan, I see how you think, give him a goal that is possible to achive, not somebody that's really funny, like Frankie Boyle.
July 13th, 2009 at 08:04 pm
How are you to sit there and compare Gaffigan and Boyle? That's so retarded that if this was Family Guy, I'd be saying "This is retarded" and cut to a clip of you holding a reb balloon.
Boom, roasted.
July 13th, 2009 at 10:59 pm
hah.... reb balloon. Yep, that summed it up well there guy.
July 14th, 2009 at 04:21 am
Your Momma, you seem to have an unhealthy obsession with poor comedy. Tell me, do you fancy your mother?
Holy Taco, how come we can no longer reply to another reply, only to the original post?
July 13th, 2009 at 04:22 pm
by my recollection, isn't "noah the intern" the most senior person on the HT staff at this point?
July 13th, 2009 at 04:26 pm
Ha. I'm a stand-up comedian, and your description of what it's like is pretty dead on. Where's this performance going down? I actually host an open mic in LA and would love to host a performance from Spencer.
July 13th, 2009 at 05:54 pm
We're in LA as well. Shoot us an email at feedback@holytaco.com and we shall discuss further.
July 13th, 2009 at 04:45 pm
My prediction: He won't last 50 seconds.
July 13th, 2009 at 06:16 pm
2 full time employees and 2 interns and still the caption the picture contest hasn't changed in three months. by the way, spencer looks 15.
July 13th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
Dude, I would've done it for FREE! You guys lack hot female interns, they can be just as ridiculous! Where can I sign up to become an intern?
July 14th, 2009 at 04:30 pm
a/s/l + pic?
July 14th, 2009 at 02:49 am
lol. Would you like to make friends with people from other country or place?
Log on __ ^-^ BlackWhiteConnect.com ^-^ ___
Then you can get help and suggestions from all over the world.
While you may find your true love or friendship there.
July 14th, 2009 at 05:58 am
You can 'Stand Up' all night with this Free Live Sex Chat...
July 14th, 2009 at 06:06 am
I remember my first night doing stand-up - had 100 people from work in the crowd. Alcohol is a bad idea b4 going on stage. Oh it helps you relax...well let me tell you 4 beers and six shots is a bit beyond relaxed.
July 14th, 2009 at 04:59 pm
If the economy were better Noah would have hit the road after that shit went down on AFF. At least he is learning to say no.
July 15th, 2009 at 07:15 am
does Noah have a fan site already? cuz he needs one
hes not getting enough exposure
I asked for the Noah at my barbershop and dude didn't even know who I was talking about
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