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What Your Favorite TV Show Really Says About You

Your favorite television show can define you as a person, but you have to be careful: sometimes the message that you think your tv tastes are sending isn’t always the one that other people receive. Here’s what your favorite TV show really says about you:
What You Think It Says: I am a genuinely happy person, and I think it would be totally awesome if life were really a musical.  Wouldn’t it be great if you could just suddenly burst out into song when you found an adorable puppy, or when someone broke up with you, or when your new puppy got run over by a car and you found it in the street with its skull all smashed in? I think that would be fantastic! It would be like High School Musical all the time!

What It Really Says: If I don’t watch Glee with my girlfriend and her musical theater friends, then she won’t have sex with me. Either that, or I’m completely flaming gay.

Law & Order

What You Think It Says: I know drama. Plus, since I’m so experienced in the world, I can handle the violence that’s portrayed in the show, and I can appreciate the "ripped from the headlines" stories because I am totally "in the know". Also, I think I may have missed my calling, because I always know who the killer is before the end of the episode.
What It Really Says: I am easily impressed by big words and stories about rape.

What You Think It Says: I’m a thinking man, and Lost is a thinking man’s show. Every week is a huge bag of surprises. I never know what time period I’m in, who’s alive or dead this week, or why that one guyliner-wearing douchebag has been 34 years old for 500 years. I especially love that with every episode I get more and more questions and less and less answers. The best thing about it, though, is that the show’s title describes exactly how it always makes me feel: Lost.
What It Really Says: I f*cking hate myself.
Big Bang Theory
What You Think It Says: I’m a stereotypical nerd, and I’m proud of it! That’s why I like that show: it makes me feel like, even though I’m easily as dorky as that kid who was Darlene’s boyfriend in Roseanne, I still feel like I could befriend a super hot, way-out-of-my-league girl who moved in next door.
What It Really Says: Nothing turns me on more than a fully-clothed hot chick sitting next to some cliche nerdy guys with eczema and nasally voices who are talking about Star Trek phasers. Nothing.
The Daily Show
What You Think It Says: I am current. I like to keep updated on all the world’s news, because I am a true man of the world. Sure, I could just watch some old, stuffy person shouting facts at me, but I prefer my news to be presented in a more fun, conversational way.
What It Really Says: I don’t understand those big word things they say on the real news. Plus, I really like when Jon Stewart gets all mad and drops F-bombs all over the place. Really, anything with F-bombs has my attention, no matter what it is.
Ugly Americans
What You Think It Says: I love absurdist animated shows, and Comedy Central’s animated shows are always spectacular.  Did you ever watch Drawn Together? That shit was hilarious! Remember how many gay jokes it had in it?! I have no reason to believe that Ugly Americans could possibly be any less funny. Plus, it’s about weird mutant people who, for some reason, have integrated into normal society and actually outnumber the normal people now. That’s absurdly hilarious too! How can this show go wrong?!
What It Really Says: I get way too stoned during South Park, and I can never find the remote to change the channel.
The Price Is Right
What You Think It Says: I am always up for a fun time, and what’s more fun than a room full of people celebrating constantly and winning great prizes?! Plus, I really appreciate nostalgia, and this show has plenty of that going on.
What It Really Says: I’m unemployed.
True Blood
What You Think It Says: I am on the cutting edge of entertainment. What’s more popular than vampires right now? I’m not talking about those sissy teenager vampires, either. I’m talking about hardcore, in-your-face, real life vampires.  Plus, I have always "understood" the importance of the supernatural world, and I’m fully aware that it is not to be underestimated.
What It Really Says: Twilight isn’t on TV, and this is the only vampire-related material I can jerk off to.

22 Responses to "What Your Favorite TV Show Really Says About You"

  1. Dangerous Man Zwei says:

    How come my post was deleted? Was it because I said “Babies are stupid”? Are you guys that ghey?

  2. ChristianH says:

    I was genuinely tickled by this entire entry until you started hating on The Daily Show. Jon Stewart makes most “real” TV news people look like the clowns they are. He gets the best, most interesting and relevant guests and conducts fantastic interviews, he finds the bullshit and bias in every network, and puts the news into a logical and reasoned context for millions of Americans. The people who watch it exclusively without keeping up with other news sources may be underinformed, but they’re still getting a better distillation of important happenings than they would mid-day on CNN.

  3. She's So Effing Right! says:

    LMAO!! The one about Ugly Americans in the best! The only time I ever watched it was when I got waaaaaaay too stoned during South Park to change the channel ;)

  4. This girl is hot says:

    WWE Monday Night RAW is my favorite show! What does it say about me? You forgot that HT!

  5. toenail says:

    i watch all these shows while i’m fucking my mom and dad. there’s nothing better to fuck to.

  6. girly says:

    Wow, obviously the dumbass who wrote this article has never seen any of these shows… probably still bitter that Firefly was such an epic failure!

  7. dysphunktion says:


  8. Boknaai says:

    You mean blow?

  9. biggielow says:

    You mean bukkakki????


  10. Dangerous Man Uno says:

    Second punks
    Well, when I see chumps like you I lol.
    Then I smoke a blunt of some weed and a fifth of jack and
    stare down f-15′s.
    Then I beat off to 4 different pron vidz at the same time.
    1.hardcore 1 softcore 1 lesbo and 1 randomly selected as I wank.
    Yeah nothing makes me happier then elbow droppin, the nuts off you punks, then shaving my balls with alcohol and fire.
    Yeah I’m BADASS

  11. pratik says:

    I’m guessing the fourth random porn is one of Donk’s MBS’s in HD.

  12. Cat man due says:

    They told richards story 2 weeks ago! You need to catch up on your LOST holytaco

  13. clubf00t says:

    lost sucks ass, watch good TV once in a while

  14. Queen Dopplepopolis says:

    NOOOOOO Lost is the greatest show ever, seriously

  15. DonkeyXote says:


  16. Chicoson says:

    I love people who think The Daily Show is news. If you are reading this and you think The Daily Show is news, you know absolutely nothing about the world and do love liberals video editing old clips.

  17. BurritoSmith says:

    Yeah, I hate how they pay attention, with there video editing software. Not like us Chicoson we just watch the republicans and libertarians on TV and then WE KNOW the WORLD. Thanks to something that takes things recorded in the past or live then edits them for us to WATCH

  18. corey trevor says:

    If your favourite show is trailer park boys:

    What is says about you – You are super cool and you appreciate good TV.

  19. ricky says:

    youre aboot that, now give me some cigerettes before i get contringent on you guys

  20. Pants Alive says:

    I hate big bang theory so SO much. I would like to stomp on the producer’s heads forever.

  21. Big W says:

    At least we finally found out why Alpert has been in his 30s forever. I hate myself after every episode of Lost. Basking in the revelation that Carlton and Kuse have stolen another hour of my miserable life and edged me ever closer to death without really telling me a damn thing. At least it will all be over in 7 more eps…. Shoot me now.

  22. Rich B says:

    So what does it say about you if you use the term “F-Bomb”?