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What Your Groceries Say About You

Looking at what people purchase at the grocery store can really give you some insight into their personal lives. Here are eight examples:
 
8. THE SWANSON "RECENTLY DIVORCED" TV DINNER
 
 
7. GENERAL MILLS’ "MY KID IS CRYING" BREAKFAST CEREAL
 
 
 
6. "I AM HIGH" BEEF JERKY (SNAP INTO ONE!)
 

 
 
5. NESTLE’S "I JUST GOT DUMPED" BITE-SIZED ICE CREAM BALLS
 
 
4. SMART DOGS "MY GIRLFRIEND AND/OR DOCTOR MADE ME BUY THESE" TOFU HOT DOGS
 
 
 
3. JIMMY DEAN’S "I WILL EAT ANYTHING" ON A STICK
 
 
2. TOSTITOS’ "I’M LATE FOR A PARTY" TORTILLA CHIPS
 
 
 
1. REDDI WHIP’S "THERE’S AN 87% CHANCE I’M USING THIS FOR SEX" ORIGINAL WHIPPED CREAM
 
 
 

27 Responses to "What Your Groceries Say About You"

  1. R1b4z01d says:

    There is an 90% chance I will use this for the N2O.

  2. 13lack says:

    Whipped cream, so true.

  3. Anonymous says:

    True story: Reddi Whip’s highest consumer sales volume is in February.

  4. SavageLettuce says:

    Gatorade: because I drank a fifth of Jack last night.

  5. Anonymous says:

    fuckin hilarious cause its 100 percent true.

  6. Jewlz says:

    So true.

  7. c.cole says:

    I agree with the whipcream ad!!!! yummy :)

  8. Anonymous says:

    bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah

  9. Anonymous says:

    does the whipped cream one imply that they’re doing whippits (inhaling the nitrous out of the can) or that they’re actually eating the whip cream during sex? i’m assuming the former.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Yo, someone has xss hijacked your site and it is redirecting everyonce in awhile to a IQ quiz affiliate page. Someone done hacked yo shit.

  11. cory says:
    Ahh, the Internet. Thanks for letting us know. If that ever happens again, can you let us know which link it happens to? Can you send it to: feedback@holytaco.com
     
    Is anyone else getting that?
  12. RoboPanda says:

    I got it trying to open the main page earlier today, but I didn’t get a look at which ads were up on the page at the time.

  13. Anonymous says:

    one is cash4gold, but the first time it was a different site

  14. Pratik says:

    Please tell me that the Jimmy Dean chocolate chip sausages are photoshopped in. That’s just fuckin gross.

  15. Anonymous says:

    Please tell me that the Jimmy Dean chocolate chip sausages on a stick are real. That’s amazing.

  16. FrankJ says:

    To be honest I was upset to not see the “I am missing class to play Halo all day in my dorm room” Easy Mac.

  17. Obaminator says:

    #6 is the best cuz they’re too high to erase slim jim on the other sides of the box, LOL, no seriously that was so lazy.

  18. Cpta Clown says:

    Kleenex: Because the jism stains on my socks started getting embarrassing.

  19. Pierre says:

    yeah, or fucking brita filters in my case…

  20. General Chicken says:

    Then you have the 5 gallons of Crystal Geyser distilled water that says “my girlfriend wont drink my tap water”.

  21. Anonymous says:

    I don’t know about that, but in the philippines they have waffle dogs. I thought it would be horrible, but damn that’s good.

  22. matt says:

    of course, in the philippians the waffle dogs are made with real dogs.

  23. matt says:

    of course, in the philippines the waffle dogs are made with real dogs.

  24. HolyJesus says:

    lol cpta clown for comment of the week. that shit was hilarious.

  25. james says:

    moar

  26. bones says:

    Yes, I can confirm the Jimmy Dean chocolate-chip pancake-wrapped sausages are very real. Saw them at a grocery store months ago…undoubtedly the brainstorm of someone who was high


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