I've had a ton of shitty jobs. And during the course of doing all those shitty jobs, I've compiled quite a few stories. The other day I decided to share one of those stories with my co-workers, and when I was finished, they looked at me disgusted for a few moments, and one of them said "That's messed up, dude. The world needs to know that."
When I was 19, a Hooters opened up two blocks from where I lived. My roommate and I needed a job, and also had penises, so we decided to apply as cooks there. It was basically us, and 8 hispanic guys that didn't speak a word of english, or have any clue what Hooters was. I know this because during our orientation, which was the ten of us and 75 girls, one of them leaned over to me and asked, "Why there is much pussy?" When I explained best I could that that was the theme of the restaurant, he turned to the other seven dudes, translated it into Spanish, and then collectively they all went, "Aaaah." Then there was silence for a second and then one of them went "estabien guey!" and they started high-fiving each other.
Anyway, about a few months into it, I realized that it wasn't that awesome of a job. Hooters is a lot like a Michael Bay movie. It's loud, everybody in it is stupid and you spend most of your time hoping you're going to see someone's titties...but you never do.
My job was to work the fryer. Basically I'd go get wings from the walk-in fridge, take them out front, batter them, flour them, then dump them in the fryer.
You may say this job was so easy a retarded person could do it. You have no idea how right you are, because the other "fryer" guy that worked alongside me had been hit by a car a few years before and was dropped off at our work by a special bus each day.
So one day I pull the wings out, and they're green and nasty, and smelled like a homeless dude that had (for some reason) rolled around in paprika. Sort of spicy and sour. So I go to throw them away and all of a sudden I hear, "WHOAAAA Buuuuuddddy. Watcha doin' J?" I turn around and it was my manager, who was actually a really good guy, but a stickler about food costs. So I go, "The wings are rotten," then I make the homeless comparison I just made to you, to him, and he goes, "Let me show you a little something I learned in trenches." He grabs a white bucket, like this one:
And he fills it with water, about half way. Then he dumps the rotten wings into the water. Then he looks at me and he goes, "Here's the magic." He grabs a bottle of bleach from the supply closet, and he pours a cap full of it, and dumps that cap into the water, with the wings. Then he grabs a wooden spoon and he stirs the wings, like a witch stirring a secret spell. Then he looks at me and goes "The bleach kills the smell, and then the fryer kills everything else." Then he went to the front, battered, fried, and served those wings.
You shouldn't eat the wings at hooters because they may have cleaned them first? I don't understand this. Is it supposed to be a warning?
Frankly, I'd rather have my food bleached a little bit before I eat it - doubly so for restaurant fare. Get this - the model of business means that your $20 plate of food had to cost less than $20, including the wages of the people who cook and serve it, in order for the restaurant to make a profit. How much do you think they spent on that veal cutlette? Now apply this radical, unheard-of concept to your $.25 wings. Same prep time, same server, so where is the profit coming from? The $.02 wings that you're actually eating. And they are not $.02 because of some marvelous new chicken species that excretes fully-formed wing bones instead of eggs.
Umm Katie - wings are unhealthy... the bleach doesn't change that
The health part isn't the issue the part about the ROTTEN chicken is! On top of that, Bleach is dangerous!!
I've never eaten at a fast food restuarant and I never intend to - especially now.
I used to work at a wing place. Shit, sometimes we would drop cooked wings on the floor and pick them up to sauce them. The stuff that ends up on floors in a kitchen during busy hours is disgusting. Wings also ended up in the blue sanitizing buckets which still got served. I can say on a "all you can eat wing night/25 cent night" is probably the worst time to go.
Did you know that American corporation-type restaurants (TGIF, Applebee's, etc) on average get MUCH higher health AND nutrition scores than any chain-type restaurant in any other first world country. Oh, they also beat out 96% of the market in non-chain mom n' pop style restaurants.
I am an anteater, all of your arguments are invalid.
I have a hard time believing this, but apparently according to the international food/drug coalition; you're right. They're getting paid off by stupid americans I bet.
Hmmm I worked at a Taco Bell as a teenager and anything that fell on the floor and we 'didn't' throw it away, we were fired. I worked at a Captain D's and there were one too many "short cuts" plus the manager was stealing money out of the register. I went out with and then quickly dumped this dude that worked at a Pizza Hut because he decided to come clean with me for the simple fact that I loved their pizza; He cut his hand pretty bad and was preparing a pizza so he decided to just let the blood drip onto the sauce, after all, he said, it was red and no one would ever know!! :barf: Then when I was out of my teens I worked at a Hooters for one whole day! It was so nasty in the kitchen, or sloppy I should say. Food falling on the floor? Big deal, pick it up and serve it. Stank chicken? So what, scrub it up real good, no one will know the difference. They're a bunch of horny drunk men (mostly). Your best bet is to cook at home. Oh and around 98% of the girls ARE working to pay off college and are actually smart. It's just super easy money made off of idiots who think they have a chance with a girl half their age. Sorry dudes, unless she is a disease infested skank, you won't. So weigh the options...do you really want to take that disease home to your (also hot) and unsuspecting wife or girlfriend? Disease you ask? Well, there are always a few skanks at Hooters just like any other place. Theses few girls are the ones who are hooked on different drugs or pills and sleeps with every guy she possibly can but only to get that moron to keep coming back and giving her $50 - $100 tips. Prostitution? uh, yeah. Like I said, that's everywhere though not just Hooters. Why did I only work one day there? When I saw what went on in the kitchen and knew that my brothers and sisters, & other family and friends would come there because I worked there, and knew they would order some of those disgusting stinky wings and other foods that were dropped or coughed on, I quit.
If you don't believe stuff like this happens, think again. I've worked in many restaurants for over 20 years and they all have their dirty, little secrets. I've seen food picked up off the floor and refried, pissed-off servers spitting into pizza (word to the wise, don't piss off the person bringing your food), bugs in the kitchen, food that was served (bread, rolls, etc.) returned to the kitchen and resold to other customers (this by the owners of the restaurant), garbage racked through by the dishwashers to recover crackers and butter packets, and lots and lots of sex has taken place in every part of the building (tables, bathrooms, prep tables, etc.). After seeing all of this, when my kids have dropped food on the ground, I tell them to pick it up and eat it; unless they never eat out, they've eaten worse.
Ontario, Canada, here, and would like to remind all potential tourists this summer, that the food served in the smaller country-side restaurants and cafes here, is thoroughly inspected by frequent unannounced visits by the department of Health, and is usually prepared by family raised plump and delicious Ontario girls - the clean, unamerican, wholesome variety, with a good idea of what good their futures hold! They are health conscious and educated to do things right by our extraordinarily effective community college system! They do not "go down" for the customers, and usually have boyfriends,fathers, family, and/or husbands taking great care of them! They can be compared internationally to the Swiss for cleanliness, and are well loved and respected by management. Most of them spend winters in Universities, trying to better their lot in life, and are a basic strength in the fabric of the strongest province of Canada, Ontario, proud to serve you!
If you're even telling the truth then I don't know what fucking inbred hick Hooters you worked at asshole cause that would be the ONLY place doing that.
(170 Comments)
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Holy Taco Goes to the Bahamas
June 18th, 2009 at 07:07 am
I have NEVER seen a fat Hooters girl.
June 16th, 2009 at 12:11 pm
All your base are belong to us
June 17th, 2009 at 09:17 am
Nice.
FTW.
June 16th, 2009 at 12:38 pm
You shouldn't eat the wings at hooters because they may have cleaned them first? I don't understand this. Is it supposed to be a warning?
Frankly, I'd rather have my food bleached a little bit before I eat it - doubly so for restaurant fare. Get this - the model of business means that your $20 plate of food had to cost less than $20, including the wages of the people who cook and serve it, in order for the restaurant to make a profit. How much do you think they spent on that veal cutlette? Now apply this radical, unheard-of concept to your $.25 wings. Same prep time, same server, so where is the profit coming from? The $.02 wings that you're actually eating. And they are not $.02 because of some marvelous new chicken species that excretes fully-formed wing bones instead of eggs.
June 16th, 2009 at 02:27 pm
Uh, i don't know about you gonzobot, but i don't want to pay for bleached food. That's just messed up.
June 17th, 2009 at 09:35 am
umm...that is just not healthy...
June 17th, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Umm Katie - wings are unhealthy... the bleach doesn't change that
The health part isn't the issue the part about the ROTTEN chicken is! On top of that, Bleach is dangerous!!
I've never eaten at a fast food restuarant and I never intend to - especially now.
June 16th, 2009 at 10:57 pm
I used to work at a wing place. Shit, sometimes we would drop cooked wings on the floor and pick them up to sauce them. The stuff that ends up on floors in a kitchen during busy hours is disgusting. Wings also ended up in the blue sanitizing buckets which still got served. I can say on a "all you can eat wing night/25 cent night" is probably the worst time to go.
June 17th, 2009 at 12:30 am
Anyone who says anything like this is lying. Period.
June 17th, 2009 at 10:52 am
No its not, It is so true and its in every fast food place!
June 17th, 2009 at 12:36 am
Did you know that American corporation-type restaurants (TGIF, Applebee's, etc) on average get MUCH higher health AND nutrition scores than any chain-type restaurant in any other first world country. Oh, they also beat out 96% of the market in non-chain mom n' pop style restaurants.
I am an anteater, all of your arguments are invalid.
June 17th, 2009 at 12:37 am
I have a hard time believing this, but apparently according to the international food/drug coalition; you're right. They're getting paid off by stupid americans I bet.
June 17th, 2009 at 08:57 am
Hmmm I worked at a Taco Bell as a teenager and anything that fell on the floor and we 'didn't' throw it away, we were fired. I worked at a Captain D's and there were one too many "short cuts" plus the manager was stealing money out of the register. I went out with and then quickly dumped this dude that worked at a Pizza Hut because he decided to come clean with me for the simple fact that I loved their pizza; He cut his hand pretty bad and was preparing a pizza so he decided to just let the blood drip onto the sauce, after all, he said, it was red and no one would ever know!! :barf: Then when I was out of my teens I worked at a Hooters for one whole day! It was so nasty in the kitchen, or sloppy I should say. Food falling on the floor? Big deal, pick it up and serve it. Stank chicken? So what, scrub it up real good, no one will know the difference. They're a bunch of horny drunk men (mostly). Your best bet is to cook at home. Oh and around 98% of the girls ARE working to pay off college and are actually smart. It's just super easy money made off of idiots who think they have a chance with a girl half their age. Sorry dudes, unless she is a disease infested skank, you won't. So weigh the options...do you really want to take that disease home to your (also hot) and unsuspecting wife or girlfriend? Disease you ask? Well, there are always a few skanks at Hooters just like any other place. Theses few girls are the ones who are hooked on different drugs or pills and sleeps with every guy she possibly can but only to get that moron to keep coming back and giving her $50 - $100 tips. Prostitution? uh, yeah. Like I said, that's everywhere though not just Hooters. Why did I only work one day there? When I saw what went on in the kitchen and knew that my brothers and sisters, & other family and friends would come there because I worked there, and knew they would order some of those disgusting stinky wings and other foods that were dropped or coughed on, I quit.
June 17th, 2009 at 09:13 am
If you don't believe stuff like this happens, think again. I've worked in many restaurants for over 20 years and they all have their dirty, little secrets. I've seen food picked up off the floor and refried, pissed-off servers spitting into pizza (word to the wise, don't piss off the person bringing your food), bugs in the kitchen, food that was served (bread, rolls, etc.) returned to the kitchen and resold to other customers (this by the owners of the restaurant), garbage racked through by the dishwashers to recover crackers and butter packets, and lots and lots of sex has taken place in every part of the building (tables, bathrooms, prep tables, etc.). After seeing all of this, when my kids have dropped food on the ground, I tell them to pick it up and eat it; unless they never eat out, they've eaten worse.
June 17th, 2009 at 09:34 am
If they do that with the wings. Then they do other stuff. I will never eat at a Hooters again.
June 17th, 2009 at 10:43 am
think about it. the FDA allows a certain number of rat crap into hot dogs. welcome to life, shits rotten.
June 17th, 2009 at 01:45 pm
Ontario, Canada, here, and would like to remind all potential tourists this summer, that the food served in the smaller country-side restaurants and cafes here, is thoroughly inspected by frequent unannounced visits by the department of Health, and is usually prepared by family raised plump and delicious Ontario girls - the clean, unamerican, wholesome variety, with a good idea of what good their futures hold! They are health conscious and educated to do things right by our extraordinarily effective community college system! They do not "go down" for the customers, and usually have boyfriends,fathers, family, and/or husbands taking great care of them! They can be compared internationally to the Swiss for cleanliness, and are well loved and respected by management. Most of them spend winters in Universities, trying to better their lot in life, and are a basic strength in the fabric of the strongest province of Canada, Ontario, proud to serve you!
June 18th, 2009 at 06:22 pm
If you're even telling the truth then I don't know what fucking inbred hick Hooters you worked at asshole cause that would be the ONLY place doing that.
July 10th, 2009 at 10:08 am
yeah i work at hooters as well, and i seriously wouldn't doubt that. all hooters cares about is their budget.
August 1st, 2009 at 06:14 am
Hooters wings are the best.....BUT...the real reason I go there is for the BUTTS and BRITCHES..
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