Thanks to the efforts of Wikileaks and crazy paranoid people overusing the Freedom of Information Act, the internet is lousy with documents that were once secreted away in filing cabinets next to Hitler’s brain and Lincoln’s robotic penis. That’s the Robotic Penis Archives in Duluth. Anyway, if there’s one thing Holy Taco can’t abide, it’s freedom of information. It’s despicable. So in the interests of keeping everything on the down and down, we’ve decided to help out the good “people” at FOX by taking their FCC complains and editing them for safety and cleanliness. No more worrying about what Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity are up to because now no one is really complaining. Just look!
This used to be a complaint about the show Red Eye, which may or may not still be on. But now it’s a sanitary account of a fun episode featuring Doug Benson. What’s the problem, viewer? Gutfeld did what to the Canadian Army that would require them to recover? Saucy! And then it inspires them to wear Capri pants and get poked. Sounds like a fun roadtrip to Saskatoon!
Arguably anything featuring Ann Coulter ans Mike Huckabee was going to be a clusterf*ck of a shit show anyway but now look at it. It’s Pro Sodomy! The viewer is also concerned that Coulter an Huckabee aren’t the only backdoor shenanigan enthusiasts on the network. Oh FOX, you’re gutter fabulous.
You knew Glenn Beck was coming so here he is, encouraging viewers to blank themselves and police officers. I think Sam Kinison used to do that. Look him up, kids, he’s gold.
Is it immature to edit this so that it says Glenn Beck encourages blowing of things? Then there’s even a spew later on. That’s fun. It’s like the whole thing is about spooge. So basically Blenn Beck is a compulsive masturbator. Keep an eye on him FCC, a squinty eye.
Seems several people noticed Beck’s penchant for spooge, is this complaint about bukkake? And if so, do we have any readers who will need to Google that word and then make a face when they find out what it means? I do not know, but I do know that this complaint was filed by someone sick of watching Beck pour liquids on the average American citizen. Dude, change the channel. Cinemax has some good shows.
Finally, let it never be said that we’re biased against the right (not the right, just idiots, many of whom seem to support Right Wing agendas), there’s also this complaint lodged against CNN. And we didn’t even have to edit it because, unlike FOX, obscenities don’t occur on the real news.