I’ve seen a couple bar fights in my day, and they usually consist of some shirt ripping, one partially landed punch, and a lot of angry guys both answering and asking questions using only the word “bro.” Never, ever, have I seen a bar fight like the one described here. People.com reports:
Troubled British singer Amy Winehouse has been arrested for an alleged assault.
A 38-year-old man filed a report stating he was “headbutted” by Winehouse after trying to hail her a cab at 3:20 a.m. on April 23. She also allegedly punched another man in the face and smoked drugs on the street.
So basically she beat the shit out of two dudes using a head butt and a punch and then after said dudes asses were kicked, she was like “f*&k, let’s smoke some crack and or a joint.” Dude, when I was in fourth grade and feeling the wrath of other kids due to my not losing my baby fat/my fat fat, I used to day dream of a scenario just like that one with me in place of winehouse, sans the drug smoking. (I think in my day dream I pulled out a capri sun after I was done, not sure).
Anyway, you have to admit, that’s a pretty bad ass move by her. That’s like out of a Van Damme movie. And not one of the shitty, late 90s, “I have to pay child support so I don’t read the script” Van Damme movies, I’m talking vintage VD. Winehouse should fill the void left by the artist formerly known as Steven Segal. Imagine Winehouse remaking BloodSport*:
*Hands down the worst photoshop I’ve ever done. Disturbingly awful.